Let's Write a Story
06-13-2003, 12:07 AM
#137
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BBBBBBBBBBBRRRRRRRRRRRIIIIIIINNNNNNNNGGGGGG!!!!!!!!!!!
"Time for pancakes" I think as my alarm goes off and I wake up at the parrish of St. Alfonso. Wow, what a weird dream! Who the heck dreams about the Guru Master Danno farting and turning into a woman and cheese wheels being thrown by Amish ninja masters named AMAF???? What did I eat last night???
Anyway, those monks sure can make good pancakes. After I get a stomach fool and am fueled up and ready to go, I head out...
"Time for pancakes" I think as my alarm goes off and I wake up at the parrish of St. Alfonso. Wow, what a weird dream! Who the heck dreams about the Guru Master Danno farting and turning into a woman and cheese wheels being thrown by Amish ninja masters named AMAF???? What did I eat last night???
Anyway, those monks sure can make good pancakes. After I get a stomach fool and am fueled up and ready to go, I head out...
06-13-2003, 01:23 AM
#140
Race Car
Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: Katy, TX - Texas Greaseslingers West
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Where it's 30 degrees below zero and the snow is as deep as the factory carpet pile on my 951 floor mats. Luckily for me the heater is stuck on high....
06-13-2003, 02:02 AM
#141
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Then as I was driving along, rocking out on my favorite Poison song I suddenly heard a thump, thump. I was really glad I had installed that glass sunroof in the car because I looked up and through the misty glass I saw the prairie dog hurtling over the car, cursing me so loud I could hear him over the lyrics 'talk dirty to me...'. What the prairie dog said moved me. He said...
06-13-2003, 03:52 AM
#142
Three Wheelin'
Prairie Dog....."it is time to tell you, you are the one"
me"what are you saying, I can dodge cheese wheels..."
Prairie Dog"no, I am saying when you are ready, you won't have too"
..and then he flew away. I looked up in time to see that I was about to rearend a ...........
me"what are you saying, I can dodge cheese wheels..."
Prairie Dog"no, I am saying when you are ready, you won't have too"
..and then he flew away. I looked up in time to see that I was about to rearend a ...........
06-13-2003, 05:44 AM
#145
Race Car
I stomped on the brakes but the leaky power steering pump dumped ATF and my right tires came loose as I started to spin counterclockwise. Several clunks later from the bad sway bar bushings, the car stopped. By now the radio is playing "look at what the cat dragged in" when I saw the engineer open my passenger door and got in pointing a deadly snap ring at me. I grabbed my sloppy shifter and swung all the way right hitting him in the head while the **** came right off the torn boot. He got mad and shot the snap ring at me. My superhuman ninja reflexes caught the flying snap ring with the snap ring pliers. The engineer said: YYYYour kung fu quite good. Must have learned well from guru Mahatma Danno when you snatched the bad wheel bearing from his palm. I am no match for you, but I will come back and get you. He jumped out of the car in a hurry and ran off into an offshoot branch of the Davidian compound similar to Ruby Ridge. By now, the ATF Mercon III squad was called in and Janet Blaupunkt Reno was on site for the stand off.....
06-13-2003, 07:23 AM
#146
Cleveland Rocks
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......but while waiting for the reinforcements to arrive, I deciced to take some time to reassess the situation. The engineer was gone, but at least I knew where he was for the moment. Looking around at the moonlit landscape that is a Montana winter's night I saw the sporadic branch of dental floss growing up through the snow. In the corner of my eye I caught a glimpse of a shimmer of light on the ground. Had the engineer dropped something in his haste to exit the car ? Yes, but it was only another set of snap ring pliers. But they weren't your ordinary set. I could barely make out an inscription on the side. Was it German ? Oh no, when I turned it sideways, I could now clearly make out the word "TOOLMASTER". Was I now looking for somebody else, too ?.......
06-13-2003, 08:47 AM
#147
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Of course! The moderation twins!!! I must be very careful now, as I run the chance of being deleted. I crept through the snow and dental floss and in the distance, I saw them. Unusually pale with white dread-locks. Wierd looking. But why were they fighting prairie dog?...
06-13-2003, 08:51 AM
#148
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In order to get through this, I knew that only one thing could get me past the twins and to the engineers compound (and back to Ohio). The gnomes!!! Thank goodness I still had the almighty MOMO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! <img border="0" alt="[jumper]" title="" src="graemlins/jumper.gif" />
06-13-2003, 10:41 AM
#149
Cleveland Rocks
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Clutching the MOMO in my hand, I thought back to the words of the prairie dog. Why was I the one ? Why couldn't it have been Danno, or Strayer, or anyone in 'ListLand other than me? I was strangely being drawn toward the fight between the gnomes and the prairie dog and started realizing that it wasn't a fight at all. They were madly tearing at the prairie dog's fur, removing it to expose- ROSS PEROT ! And all the gnomes had ATF shirts on ! I felt a tap on my shoulder from behind and turned around and looked through Testor's tinted eyes up into the face of Janet Blaupunkt Reno. Now I was really confused. A fake Easter bunny, a fake prairie dog, fake smelly chicks in drag, me the chosen one ? "Fear not," Reno said, "For it may soon be over." She then motioned for the gnomes to take their positions around the compound. An eerie silence fell across the Montana tundra, soon to be broken by the distant sound of a whining K27. Reno turned to me and said, "Uh oh, this may not go as planned............"
06-13-2003, 10:49 AM
#150
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But no... it wasn't a K27... with the glare of its single headlight, and the tell-tale "stich-a-ta stich-a-ta" of its 12 cc engine, it could only be Trevor Cruchcog and Tom T Missengear in the Cylops!!! <img border="0" alt="[jumper]" title="" src="graemlins/jumper.gif" />
Jim 1987 944S <img border="0" alt="[burnout]" title="" src="graemlins/burnout.gif" />
Jim 1987 944S <img border="0" alt="[burnout]" title="" src="graemlins/burnout.gif" />