What are some Rock-esque moves you've pulled?
12-14-2004, 05:28 PM
#46
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Originally Posted by Sasquatch
Speaking of "lawn jobs"....
My house was the target of repeated lawn jobs two summers ago. I have a corner lot that is my dream home. To say I was pissed was an understatement. I was reasonably sure it was the kids accross the street and one house down. I would get hit about one night a week for 3 weeks straight. The cops were no help. So, in Italian fasion, I solved it myself.
Just inside the grass from the side walk on both entry and exit routes I pounded in pieces of rebar with the tops angle cut. I put them at about 6" centers/staggered. They protruded the ground about 3", but was just under grass height.
Three nights later I heard a rather loud screech and resulting crash. The sight that fell before my eyes going to the front door could not have been paid for. There sat my front yard, with huge ruts accross it, and the beat up ford tempo of the neighbors kids stuffed into the side of his mothers year old mini van parked on the street.
I know I had opened myself up to some frivoulous lawsuit, but I was pissed. The result was this:
Kids had to cut up the sod in my yard, smooth it all out, and replace the sod. They had to remove all of the rebar punjii sticks. Their mom took away their car, permanantly untill they move outof the house at 18 or so.
Through their reconstruction of my yard I spent considerable time talking with them about responsibilty and respecting other peoples property. It all ended well and all relationships have mended. Pretty good kids now. They at least learned not to mess with the Italian accross the street.
My house was the target of repeated lawn jobs two summers ago. I have a corner lot that is my dream home. To say I was pissed was an understatement. I was reasonably sure it was the kids accross the street and one house down. I would get hit about one night a week for 3 weeks straight. The cops were no help. So, in Italian fasion, I solved it myself.
Just inside the grass from the side walk on both entry and exit routes I pounded in pieces of rebar with the tops angle cut. I put them at about 6" centers/staggered. They protruded the ground about 3", but was just under grass height.
Three nights later I heard a rather loud screech and resulting crash. The sight that fell before my eyes going to the front door could not have been paid for. There sat my front yard, with huge ruts accross it, and the beat up ford tempo of the neighbors kids stuffed into the side of his mothers year old mini van parked on the street.
I know I had opened myself up to some frivoulous lawsuit, but I was pissed. The result was this:
Kids had to cut up the sod in my yard, smooth it all out, and replace the sod. They had to remove all of the rebar punjii sticks. Their mom took away their car, permanantly untill they move outof the house at 18 or so.
Through their reconstruction of my yard I spent considerable time talking with them about responsibilty and respecting other peoples property. It all ended well and all relationships have mended. Pretty good kids now. They at least learned not to mess with the Italian accross the street.
12-14-2004, 05:43 PM
#47
Rennlist Member
Punjii sticks, i love it!
Well, Well, I bought my 944 from a used car lot, the salesman hands me the keys after I had finished all the paper work, I got in the car, backed up, and bang, hit a pole... what a bummer. 600 dollars in damage for body work and paint. Every time I back up now im sure to look behind me!
Well, Well, I bought my 944 from a used car lot, the salesman hands me the keys after I had finished all the paper work, I got in the car, backed up, and bang, hit a pole... what a bummer. 600 dollars in damage for body work and paint. Every time I back up now im sure to look behind me!
12-14-2004, 05:52 PM
#48
Burning Brakes
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My parents house was like Sasquatch's, corner lot, frequent lawn jobs around graduation. They usually took out the cedar post w/mail box while they were at it. Dad bought a 10' stick of 4" steel pipe, set it 6' in the ground with lots of concrete. He put the same cedar over the outside, you couldn't tell it was "heavily" reinforced.
The culprits must have seen him do it, no one ever lawn jobbed him again.
Lou
The culprits must have seen him do it, no one ever lawn jobbed him again.
Lou
12-14-2004, 05:53 PM
#49
Jm - I had just signed the papers on the last Impala SS that the dealer in my city had, the day before I started college. Black, hot, cool! The girl gets in the car, puts it in R and proceeds to back it into a new Corvette. Needless to say, I did not buy it. That is how I ended up with my first NA.
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12-14-2004, 05:58 PM
#50
Drifting
Ha, very nice Ken.
My story is that one-day I was driving through a spot in a road where there is at least one wreck each time it rains. I was going downhill about to turn while it was raining. I was going slightly under the speed limit, 35 mph. All of a sudden the back end started coming around, I tried to correct with steering but with no luck. I thought about giving it some gas but was too afraid because I had never done a move like that and was extremely close to a guardrail. I pushed the brake slightly which made me spin faster but my forward movement slowed a little. I then went backwards into a ditch. I had just spun 270 degrees and was scared ****less. There was a rock cliff behind me that I slammed into; I thought the car was wrecked. I jumped out and looked at it, from what I could tell there was absolutely no damage. I was relieved. The car wouldn't start though. I called my dad and he was nearby, he was on his way to pull me out. The front of my car was in the road a couple of inches, but not over the white edge line. About 5 cars passed until a mustang came around the blind turn pretty quick; the female driver went into the other lane to "miss" me and sideswiped another car. The police officer that showed up on the scene said it was absolutely not my fault, but the insurance company thought otherwise, they held me like 40% accountable or something like that. I even witnessed another wreck while sitting there that day.
Turns out the car wouldn't start because of relays that loosened themselves from the jolt of the ditch. The only damage was a slightly crushed spare tire well and a small dent under the driver's door. I'm lucky there wasn't a car in the oposite lane. I am now EXTREMELY cautious in the rain. Another part to add to the humility is that while I was in the ditch a friend of mine with an S2 passed, we casually waved at each other.
My story is that one-day I was driving through a spot in a road where there is at least one wreck each time it rains. I was going downhill about to turn while it was raining. I was going slightly under the speed limit, 35 mph. All of a sudden the back end started coming around, I tried to correct with steering but with no luck. I thought about giving it some gas but was too afraid because I had never done a move like that and was extremely close to a guardrail. I pushed the brake slightly which made me spin faster but my forward movement slowed a little. I then went backwards into a ditch. I had just spun 270 degrees and was scared ****less. There was a rock cliff behind me that I slammed into; I thought the car was wrecked. I jumped out and looked at it, from what I could tell there was absolutely no damage. I was relieved. The car wouldn't start though. I called my dad and he was nearby, he was on his way to pull me out. The front of my car was in the road a couple of inches, but not over the white edge line. About 5 cars passed until a mustang came around the blind turn pretty quick; the female driver went into the other lane to "miss" me and sideswiped another car. The police officer that showed up on the scene said it was absolutely not my fault, but the insurance company thought otherwise, they held me like 40% accountable or something like that. I even witnessed another wreck while sitting there that day.
Turns out the car wouldn't start because of relays that loosened themselves from the jolt of the ditch. The only damage was a slightly crushed spare tire well and a small dent under the driver's door. I'm lucky there wasn't a car in the oposite lane. I am now EXTREMELY cautious in the rain. Another part to add to the humility is that while I was in the ditch a friend of mine with an S2 passed, we casually waved at each other.
12-14-2004, 06:01 PM
#51
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Originally Posted by Sasquatch
Speaking of "lawn jobs"....
My house was the target of repeated lawn jobs two summers ago. I have a corner lot that is my dream home. To say I was pissed was an understatement. I was reasonably sure it was the kids accross the street and one house down. I would get hit about one night a week for 3 weeks straight. The cops were no help. So, in Italian fasion, I solved it myself.
Just inside the grass from the side walk on both entry and exit routes I pounded in pieces of rebar with the tops angle cut. I put them at about 6" centers/staggered. They protruded the ground about 3", but was just under grass height.
Three nights later I heard a rather loud screech and resulting crash. The sight that fell before my eyes going to the front door could not have been paid for. There sat my front yard, with huge ruts accross it, and the beat up ford tempo of the neighbors kids stuffed into the side of his mothers year old mini van parked on the street.
I know I had opened myself up to some frivoulous lawsuit, but I was pissed. The result was this:
Kids had to cut up the sod in my yard, smooth it all out, and replace the sod. They had to remove all of the rebar punjii sticks. Their mom took away their car, permanantly untill they move outof the house at 18 or so.
Through their reconstruction of my yard I spent considerable time talking with them about responsibilty and respecting other peoples property. It all ended well and all relationships have mended. Pretty good kids now. They at least learned not to mess with the Italian accross the street.
My house was the target of repeated lawn jobs two summers ago. I have a corner lot that is my dream home. To say I was pissed was an understatement. I was reasonably sure it was the kids accross the street and one house down. I would get hit about one night a week for 3 weeks straight. The cops were no help. So, in Italian fasion, I solved it myself.
Just inside the grass from the side walk on both entry and exit routes I pounded in pieces of rebar with the tops angle cut. I put them at about 6" centers/staggered. They protruded the ground about 3", but was just under grass height.
Three nights later I heard a rather loud screech and resulting crash. The sight that fell before my eyes going to the front door could not have been paid for. There sat my front yard, with huge ruts accross it, and the beat up ford tempo of the neighbors kids stuffed into the side of his mothers year old mini van parked on the street.
I know I had opened myself up to some frivoulous lawsuit, but I was pissed. The result was this:
Kids had to cut up the sod in my yard, smooth it all out, and replace the sod. They had to remove all of the rebar punjii sticks. Their mom took away their car, permanantly untill they move outof the house at 18 or so.
Through their reconstruction of my yard I spent considerable time talking with them about responsibilty and respecting other peoples property. It all ended well and all relationships have mended. Pretty good kids now. They at least learned not to mess with the Italian accross the street.
We got lawn jobbed a few times, resulting in my dad putting rocks along the sidewalk along our front yard. one was on the corner of the driveway. A while later, I had to drive out to drop my bro off someplace. It was dark, and IIRC he had parked his truck on the driveway, so that to back out I had to go between this rock and his truck. Now I dont drive my moms van too often, so im horrible at back it out of the garage, since its a tough spot. I back out crooked, and im focussed on NOT hitting his truck. So what do I back over? This large rock. My moms caravan made it over with the back tire, so I straighened out as best I could and hoping I wouldnt run over it again with the front.... Which is just what I do anyway. Front makes it up, and over but on the down stroke it bottoms out and dislodges the wheel wheel plastic. I back out onto the street with loud scraping and much noise. I pull it all the way loose, toss it in the car and go on my way. My dad got some pretty mad words about silly rock placement and truck parking... But I was the one out in the dark anyway snapping that plastic back into place
Which dovetails into prolly what is my truest Rock moment... The Day the Blue Van Died. It was summer and I was driving my friend Ashleigh (she and I have been through a lot of these moments together...
) to a job interview. We are going along and the Caravan starts smoking some white. Not a lot and the guages are normal, so I decide to push on as the mechanic is only blocks from her job interview, so really its two birds with one stone. I get onto the road leading there, im only 5 or so minutes away from the job and from there 90 seconds to the mechanics... Till a cloud forms behind me, a solid cloud of white. I couldnt see anything behind me, AT ALL. We are of course thinking "OH ****" because this road has nowhere to pull over. Ditches on each side, no sidewalk, no shoulder. I push on to try to get her there, get to the mechanic, and not block the road. I make it past that section, 20 feet past where it finally becomes two lanes, and the van quites. Doesnt have a drop of coolant left. Nothing. Wont start, but turns over so its not seized. I had driven it till it died
She made it to her interview, and got the job, because I had pushed on far enough to make to a short distance from the skytrain station, where she hopped on, and went to the next station which was across the street from her interview. I stayed there with this van on the side of the street waiting for the towtruck. She came back before the truck got to me... She she and I had to cram into this towtruck cab with a rather smelly towtrucker, who uh seemed to appreciate her female qualities as soon as he saw her. I of course took the middle to spare her from that.
The van got towed the few blocks to the mechanics shop, which was literally a few minutes away, but the towtruck took an hour to get to me
Damage to the van? One cooked headgasket one warped head. Mechanic rebuilt the head, new valves, lifters, etc. That was two years ago now? To this day it still sounds like a big diesel from all the lifter knock and ticking from the brand new valves, springs, and lifters in the old head. My parents werent mad at me, they knew it was going to happen so I couldnt be blamed. They were glad she got the job, and I got employee discount on DVDs and stuff since her job was at A&B Sound 
12-14-2004, 06:01 PM
#52
Cleveland Rocks
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Originally Posted by pete944
Great story Wade!!
What year Javelin? I had a 1970 Jav with a 304V8 & 3 speed manual. I loved that car!
What year Javelin? I had a 1970 Jav with a 304V8 & 3 speed manual. I loved that car!
One of my favorite of all the cars I owned. One of the first cars I ever painted. But since they were so rare, and new body parts so hard to find at the time, it was becoming a hodge podge of patch panels as I fixed it when it rusted. I stripped it and had it crushed. I almost cried.......
I still look around for them occasionally. I was actually looking for one when I found the 951. But that's another story........
BACK ON TOPIC NOW!!!!!!!!!
12-14-2004, 06:26 PM
#53
My uncle used to get his mailbox bashed in every few months, so he took some of the old race tires off the 944 and cut an opening for the mailbox to stick through the top one and put them around the mailbox post. His mailbox never was attacked successfully again. If they did try, I'm sure it was a nice surprise!
12-14-2004, 07:25 PM
#54
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Back in highschool, I stole one of these. My friend's parents were out of town so I rewired the blower for 110 and we threw a kegger. Invited the whole school, and most of them came. Charged $5 a head. Big stolen bounce house and a few kegs of beer, what more could you ask for on a weekend when your 16?
Later that night the cops came to take it back to BurgerKing.
Later that night the cops came to take it back to BurgerKing.
12-14-2004, 08:00 PM
#55
The Hoffinator
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ok.. this is going to take a while...
alot of you guys know some of this,.... some of you dont.
ok.. 20 years old, hauling my drumset in the back of the acura to a party that my gf was going to be at. i got asked to sit in with this band, and with this girl i just started seeing the week before there, i was pressed to get there and show off. so im haulin ***.. driving like a mainiac.. its raining... get to one last red light befor ethe place where the party was. smoking like a fiend, i need one more cigarette before i get there. my lighter was in my right pocket, as were alot of recipts, money, change and other crap. so i straighten my leg arc my hips digging for this damn lighter (those who smoke know the drill). so anyways my head is down for a sec while im trying to get this lighter.. my shoes are wet from the rain.. foot slips off brake, BOOM right into the *** end of a jeep grand cheerokie.
cops never showed up,. jeep wasnt hurt too bad.. my insurance took care of it and b/c cops didnt show i didnt get a ticket.. im lucky.. but still a dumb *** (and now looked like a fool infront of this chick.. luckily she was all worried about me and wondering if i was ok.. car looked worse than it was.. got some that night so i must not have looked that bad).
alot of you guys know some of this,.... some of you dont.
ok.. 20 years old, hauling my drumset in the back of the acura to a party that my gf was going to be at. i got asked to sit in with this band, and with this girl i just started seeing the week before there, i was pressed to get there and show off. so im haulin ***.. driving like a mainiac.. its raining... get to one last red light befor ethe place where the party was. smoking like a fiend, i need one more cigarette before i get there. my lighter was in my right pocket, as were alot of recipts, money, change and other crap. so i straighten my leg arc my hips digging for this damn lighter (those who smoke know the drill). so anyways my head is down for a sec while im trying to get this lighter.. my shoes are wet from the rain.. foot slips off brake, BOOM right into the *** end of a jeep grand cheerokie.
cops never showed up,. jeep wasnt hurt too bad.. my insurance took care of it and b/c cops didnt show i didnt get a ticket.. im lucky.. but still a dumb *** (and now looked like a fool infront of this chick.. luckily she was all worried about me and wondering if i was ok.. car looked worse than it was.. got some that night so i must not have looked that bad).
12-14-2004, 08:09 PM
#56
I have a good one - I posted it on Rennlist 2 years ago.
I walked out to my garage and didn't turn on the light. I opened the PASSENGER door to remove the sunroof - which I then laid on my sand bucket (New England). I then walked over to the driver side, got in, started it up and backed out OOOOOOOOOOps. Because it was dark, I didn't see the passenger door open until it smashed into MY FIBERGLASS SUNROOF PANEL, wrecking both of them. Isn't that funny?
My wife had wrapped the car up in "caution" tape when I got home the next day.
I walked out to my garage and didn't turn on the light. I opened the PASSENGER door to remove the sunroof - which I then laid on my sand bucket (New England). I then walked over to the driver side, got in, started it up and backed out OOOOOOOOOOps. Because it was dark, I didn't see the passenger door open until it smashed into MY FIBERGLASS SUNROOF PANEL, wrecking both of them. Isn't that funny?
My wife had wrapped the car up in "caution" tape when I got home the next day.
12-14-2004, 08:12 PM
#57
The Hoffinator
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TALES OF BRAVE ULYSSES
oh yes.. the great road trip that started it all. murphy and his minions at their finest.
when getting the car ready before the trip it started rattleing and running like ***. i just figured it was a timing problem.. still never straightened out. then the oil preassure gauge stoppped reading.. luckily it was just a ground, reconnected it and it was fine (was an omen though..)
anyways after a week of trying to get this thing running right its still rattling and tapping.. my friends from va and md who are driving west with me show up and ask are you suire its ready? that doesnt sound good. why dont you leave it and ride with one of us.
determined i say no.. its just a little out of tune. its fine.. its in perfect shape and ready for the trip. (secretly i know im wrong but im macho.. stubborn and determined to do it!)
get to iowa that night runs worse.. looses a little power but still keeps up. had a heart to heart with my dad.. decided screw it.. im gonna keep going SOLVANG OR BUST!
get to colorado.. runs like ***.. 'probably the altitude' it was a little.. but not that mch
its tapoping and popping and missing.. sounds like its gonna go boom any moment. "sure its fine.. thats the way they are suppose to sound" is what i told people.. secretly "oh **** oh **** oh **** oh **** oh ****.. please god dont blow up.. hail mary full of grace.... our father who art.. glory be to the.."
in nevada it was 1/2 a centemiter from red on the temp gauge.. up opne mountian my oil preassure read 5 psi. yeah.. scary ****.
somehow make it to cali.. find out suprise.. broken valve spring.. blown valve, blown seat, valve guide.. the works.
had to rely on others to save my *** and get me home. was embarased (dont like to rely on others for help like that. dont wanna be a chairity case.. but they did it as a supprise, out of the kindness of their hearts, which i am forever grateful and really had no choice but to take to get home.)
oh yes.. the great road trip that started it all. murphy and his minions at their finest.
when getting the car ready before the trip it started rattleing and running like ***. i just figured it was a timing problem.. still never straightened out. then the oil preassure gauge stoppped reading.. luckily it was just a ground, reconnected it and it was fine (was an omen though..)
anyways after a week of trying to get this thing running right its still rattling and tapping.. my friends from va and md who are driving west with me show up and ask are you suire its ready? that doesnt sound good. why dont you leave it and ride with one of us.
determined i say no.. its just a little out of tune. its fine.. its in perfect shape and ready for the trip. (secretly i know im wrong but im macho.. stubborn and determined to do it!)
get to iowa that night runs worse.. looses a little power but still keeps up. had a heart to heart with my dad.. decided screw it.. im gonna keep going SOLVANG OR BUST!
get to colorado.. runs like ***.. 'probably the altitude' it was a little.. but not that mch
its tapoping and popping and missing.. sounds like its gonna go boom any moment. "sure its fine.. thats the way they are suppose to sound" is what i told people.. secretly "oh **** oh **** oh **** oh **** oh ****.. please god dont blow up.. hail mary full of grace.... our father who art.. glory be to the.."
in nevada it was 1/2 a centemiter from red on the temp gauge.. up opne mountian my oil preassure read 5 psi. yeah.. scary ****.
somehow make it to cali.. find out suprise.. broken valve spring.. blown valve, blown seat, valve guide.. the works.
had to rely on others to save my *** and get me home. was embarased (dont like to rely on others for help like that. dont wanna be a chairity case.. but they did it as a supprise, out of the kindness of their hearts, which i am forever grateful and really had no choice but to take to get home.)
12-14-2004, 08:19 PM
#58
The Hoffinator
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Rennlist Member
oh ****.. not again!
because i only had enough cash, with donations to have only the one valve/spring etc that was damaged replaced, thats all that was repaird.
well in spring of 04 it happened agaion.. sort of.. one of the valve springs that werent replaced in cali, broke. so.. i did a full top end rebuild. to save money i didnt replace the valves.. just hd em reground. well one of the valves either warped or burned when i was traveling west for a second time. i can only assume it happened in the middle of the mojave dester when i drove through there at 4 ion the afernoon!! (my oil temp gaige never went above 2/3.. but head temp isnt the same as oil temp!!).
needless to say driving it home like that wasnt too fun.. luckily i didnt blow up. i didnt find ouit the probs til i was on my way home.. i didnt have time or money or help to get it fixed.
anyways.. here is a song i wrote about it, goes to the tune of 'my darling clementine"
my darling engine
(sang to the tune of my darling clementine..)
In an engine, in an engine,
trying to save a dime
Dwelt an amature wrench,
And his buddy murphy
Oh my darling, oh my darling,
Oh my darling, engine..
compressions low and leak down sucks
Dreadful sorry, engine..
broke a valve spring so i redid
the top end,
replaced her pistons the springs too,
but i reused the valves,
Oh my darling, oh my darling,
Oh my darling, engine
burnt a valve and it rides rough
Dreadful sorry, engine..
Drove her out to californey,
just 2,000 miles after the job,
thought it ran good, just like it should
i was on cloud nine, my poor eng-ine.
Oh my darling, oh my darling,
Oh my darling, engine!
cut some corners, now im grounded
Dreadful sorry, engine
out in cali, out in the bay
she started to run real rough
so i took her to a shop,
and nervously awaited...
Oh my darling, oh my darling,
Oh my darling, engine!
compressions low and leak down sucks
Dreadful sorry, engine..
not again, my luck sucks
god i hate that murphy guy..
#1 holds 40%
Deven says i burnt a valve...
Oh my darling, oh my darling,
Oh my darling, engine!
compressions low and leak down sucks
Dreadful sorry, engine..
now im pissed, now im livid
im out for blood
why did i cut corners
now my name is mud
Oh my darling, oh my darling,
Oh my darling, engine!
compressions low and leak down sucks
Dreadful sorry, engine..
now how am i gonna
get my butt back east?
3000 miles from my home
now i feel all alone
Oh my darling, oh my darling,
Oh my darling, 12!
compressions low and leak down sucks
i cant believe i burnt another valve!
cant get a plane so now ive gotta drive
oh please dont grenade my engine
please god dont blow up
out in nevada
Oh my darling, oh my darling,
Oh my darling, engine!
compressions low and leak down sucks
Dreadful sorry, engine..
desert's hot, and its lonely
and my engine runs like crud
please dont blow up or leave me stranded
i promise to fix you up..
Oh my darling, oh my darling,
Oh my darling, engine!
compressions low and leak down sucks
Dreadful sorry, engine..
so i babied her and some how she got home
with out blowing up
now i face a full rebuild
all over trying to save *400 bucks.
Oh my darling, oh my darling,
Oh my darling, engine!
compressions low and leak down sucks
Dreadful sorry, engine..
i know i cant sing and i cant rhyme
so thats why im shuttin up..
please excuse this crappy song
i thought it showed my point..
Oh my darling, oh my darling,
Oh my darling, engine!
compressions low and leak down sucks
Dreadful sorry, engine..
*$400 is how much new valves cost, intake exhuast for all 4 cylinders..
because i only had enough cash, with donations to have only the one valve/spring etc that was damaged replaced, thats all that was repaird.
well in spring of 04 it happened agaion.. sort of.. one of the valve springs that werent replaced in cali, broke. so.. i did a full top end rebuild. to save money i didnt replace the valves.. just hd em reground. well one of the valves either warped or burned when i was traveling west for a second time. i can only assume it happened in the middle of the mojave dester when i drove through there at 4 ion the afernoon!! (my oil temp gaige never went above 2/3.. but head temp isnt the same as oil temp!!).
needless to say driving it home like that wasnt too fun.. luckily i didnt blow up. i didnt find ouit the probs til i was on my way home.. i didnt have time or money or help to get it fixed.
anyways.. here is a song i wrote about it, goes to the tune of 'my darling clementine"
my darling engine
(sang to the tune of my darling clementine..)
In an engine, in an engine,
trying to save a dime
Dwelt an amature wrench,
And his buddy murphy
Oh my darling, oh my darling,
Oh my darling, engine..
compressions low and leak down sucks
Dreadful sorry, engine..
broke a valve spring so i redid
the top end,
replaced her pistons the springs too,
but i reused the valves,
Oh my darling, oh my darling,
Oh my darling, engine
burnt a valve and it rides rough
Dreadful sorry, engine..
Drove her out to californey,
just 2,000 miles after the job,
thought it ran good, just like it should
i was on cloud nine, my poor eng-ine.
Oh my darling, oh my darling,
Oh my darling, engine!
cut some corners, now im grounded
Dreadful sorry, engine
out in cali, out in the bay
she started to run real rough
so i took her to a shop,
and nervously awaited...
Oh my darling, oh my darling,
Oh my darling, engine!
compressions low and leak down sucks
Dreadful sorry, engine..
not again, my luck sucks
god i hate that murphy guy..
#1 holds 40%
Deven says i burnt a valve...
Oh my darling, oh my darling,
Oh my darling, engine!
compressions low and leak down sucks
Dreadful sorry, engine..
now im pissed, now im livid
im out for blood
why did i cut corners
now my name is mud
Oh my darling, oh my darling,
Oh my darling, engine!
compressions low and leak down sucks
Dreadful sorry, engine..
now how am i gonna
get my butt back east?
3000 miles from my home
now i feel all alone
Oh my darling, oh my darling,
Oh my darling, 12!
compressions low and leak down sucks
i cant believe i burnt another valve!
cant get a plane so now ive gotta drive
oh please dont grenade my engine
please god dont blow up
out in nevada
Oh my darling, oh my darling,
Oh my darling, engine!
compressions low and leak down sucks
Dreadful sorry, engine..
desert's hot, and its lonely
and my engine runs like crud
please dont blow up or leave me stranded
i promise to fix you up..
Oh my darling, oh my darling,
Oh my darling, engine!
compressions low and leak down sucks
Dreadful sorry, engine..
so i babied her and some how she got home
with out blowing up
now i face a full rebuild
all over trying to save *400 bucks.
Oh my darling, oh my darling,
Oh my darling, engine!
compressions low and leak down sucks
Dreadful sorry, engine..
i know i cant sing and i cant rhyme
so thats why im shuttin up..
please excuse this crappy song
i thought it showed my point..
Oh my darling, oh my darling,
Oh my darling, engine!
compressions low and leak down sucks
Dreadful sorry, engine..
*$400 is how much new valves cost, intake exhuast for all 4 cylinders..
12-14-2004, 08:25 PM
#59
Thinking outside da' bun...
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Here's mine, with a visual aid. Here's our driveway. As you can see its one steep **** up to the street:
Well it was about first or second year in college and I was ready to go work before spending the rest of the day at school. It had rained the night before then radically cooled down and thus everything turned to ice. As he usually does, the old man put his car up at the top of the street the night before because he had a Lexus with crap tires. I had a Suzuki Samauri, and although it was a piece and after an hour of full heat in the dead of winter I could still see my breath inside it, it was my first car and in every previous winter was an absolute sled dog.
So I got up that a.m. not thinking much of it. Pops went off to work and I was soon to follow. It was about 11am however and the sun came out. The ice on the driveway had melted enough so that it was slicker than a skating rink the whole way down. I did a field test and practically did the Eddie The Eagle rendition all the way down on my sneakers, but in the words of Jeff Spicoli after wrecking Jefferson's car "I can fix it", I uttered the immortal words "I can make it."
I locked the hubs and put that bastard into 4WD Low. I meant business and I got all the way to the back end of the driveway so I could get a running start. The Sushi Warrior had never let me down before and I knew I could count on it one more time. So I revved her up and floored it. I was spinning a bit down on the flat part of the driveway but I was still making forward momentum. By the time I reached the point where the driveway starts going up by that stone retaining wall, I thought I had it under control. I pride myself on doing my homework.
I get about 1/2 the way up the driveway -- maybe 25 feet -- and I can feel Lil Pepe' losing her mojo. Slower and slower Im going. I can feel the tires underneath me spinning. Its about this time where I say "Oh ****, Im going to pissin' die." I gave myself the last rites right there on the spot because back down at the end of the driveway is a big hill that goes down into a creek. It was jaws of life time.
A moment later Im stopped on the driveway. Its like being weightless on the Screamy Meemy at the amusement park. For a split second I felt one with nature. I was homogenated with the world. But that quickly passed and I was back into the clutches of death.
Soon the Poo Poo Platter starts sliding backwards back down the driveway and I can see the horizon fading off into the distance. Children in their winter attire making snowmen in their lawns were waving goodbye as I drifted backwards into the abyss. About second later Im skating down the driveway like Bonnie Blair. If nothing slows down my momentum Im going to hurdle down a ravine and into the creek at about 20mph in a ****tyass softtop japanese econo sport utility. Imagine just for one second the shame in that. We can all die in different ways. Most of us want to retire to stud and go out in a blaze of glory. I was gonna die in a 88 Samauri JX without ever leaving my friggin driveway.
Fortunately, luck was on my side that day. God's invisible hand guided the Samauri into the stone retaining wall, scrubbing about 10mph off my slide into the coffin of death. The scrubbed speed helped keep me from cartwheeling down the end of the driveway and into the creeked ravine, but it also spun me caddywompus and into the neighbors yard after a couple 360s. Of course, on the ride down I had closed my eyes and prayed for a quick death so it should come as no surprise that I stalled the vehicle. By this time I have half the neighborhood under the age of 12 standing at the top of the driveway looking down and wandering what all the fuss was about. I get out of the car and look at the stone retaining wall. Hardly a scratch. I look at the back end of the Samauri and it took all the blunt force trauma big-time.
Its about this time that half of those skankyass rich kid pukes start sledding down the driveway in their Super Tubes and Flying discs. "Man Mr. What happened to your car?" "Your driveway is awesome." "My dad says your dog barks too much." "My sister wants you to quit staring at her in her bedroom." "Have you ever skateboarded down this." "Why did you drive your car into the wall."
Well it was about first or second year in college and I was ready to go work before spending the rest of the day at school. It had rained the night before then radically cooled down and thus everything turned to ice. As he usually does, the old man put his car up at the top of the street the night before because he had a Lexus with crap tires. I had a Suzuki Samauri, and although it was a piece and after an hour of full heat in the dead of winter I could still see my breath inside it, it was my first car and in every previous winter was an absolute sled dog.
So I got up that a.m. not thinking much of it. Pops went off to work and I was soon to follow. It was about 11am however and the sun came out. The ice on the driveway had melted enough so that it was slicker than a skating rink the whole way down. I did a field test and practically did the Eddie The Eagle rendition all the way down on my sneakers, but in the words of Jeff Spicoli after wrecking Jefferson's car "I can fix it", I uttered the immortal words "I can make it."
I locked the hubs and put that bastard into 4WD Low. I meant business and I got all the way to the back end of the driveway so I could get a running start. The Sushi Warrior had never let me down before and I knew I could count on it one more time. So I revved her up and floored it. I was spinning a bit down on the flat part of the driveway but I was still making forward momentum. By the time I reached the point where the driveway starts going up by that stone retaining wall, I thought I had it under control. I pride myself on doing my homework.
I get about 1/2 the way up the driveway -- maybe 25 feet -- and I can feel Lil Pepe' losing her mojo. Slower and slower Im going. I can feel the tires underneath me spinning. Its about this time where I say "Oh ****, Im going to pissin' die." I gave myself the last rites right there on the spot because back down at the end of the driveway is a big hill that goes down into a creek. It was jaws of life time.
A moment later Im stopped on the driveway. Its like being weightless on the Screamy Meemy at the amusement park. For a split second I felt one with nature. I was homogenated with the world. But that quickly passed and I was back into the clutches of death.
Soon the Poo Poo Platter starts sliding backwards back down the driveway and I can see the horizon fading off into the distance. Children in their winter attire making snowmen in their lawns were waving goodbye as I drifted backwards into the abyss. About second later Im skating down the driveway like Bonnie Blair. If nothing slows down my momentum Im going to hurdle down a ravine and into the creek at about 20mph in a ****tyass softtop japanese econo sport utility. Imagine just for one second the shame in that. We can all die in different ways. Most of us want to retire to stud and go out in a blaze of glory. I was gonna die in a 88 Samauri JX without ever leaving my friggin driveway.
Fortunately, luck was on my side that day. God's invisible hand guided the Samauri into the stone retaining wall, scrubbing about 10mph off my slide into the coffin of death. The scrubbed speed helped keep me from cartwheeling down the end of the driveway and into the creeked ravine, but it also spun me caddywompus and into the neighbors yard after a couple 360s. Of course, on the ride down I had closed my eyes and prayed for a quick death so it should come as no surprise that I stalled the vehicle. By this time I have half the neighborhood under the age of 12 standing at the top of the driveway looking down and wandering what all the fuss was about. I get out of the car and look at the stone retaining wall. Hardly a scratch. I look at the back end of the Samauri and it took all the blunt force trauma big-time.
Its about this time that half of those skankyass rich kid pukes start sledding down the driveway in their Super Tubes and Flying discs. "Man Mr. What happened to your car?" "Your driveway is awesome." "My dad says your dog barks too much." "My sister wants you to quit staring at her in her bedroom." "Have you ever skateboarded down this." "Why did you drive your car into the wall."
12-14-2004, 08:27 PM
#60
Wax On, Wax Off
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Yeah, I was on a road trip to Indiana...On the way out, leaving the Kansas turnpike, i look in my mirror, and see a nice, large cloud of white smoke...from my car of course.... I'm like, "Looks like I'll need to rebuild a head when I get back" so I continue on...I'm checkin my oil every 300 miles or so, and each time, I needed to add a quart. "Yep...a head rebuild is coming soon". I get to Indiana, and with the lower altitude, my 924S is a fast(er) machine! I enjoyed this, so I ran the car hard.... Yeah, Probably not smart, but hindsight is 20/20.
Anyway, driving back, still adding oil every 300 miles, I hear a clicking sound develop... "Well, a lifter died. Definately rebuilding the head when I get back." about an hour later, the clicking was MUCH louder... I told my companion we were fine....
then, doin 75 on I-70, the clicking is audible OVER the exhaust AND music... I look at the oil pressure gauge, you geussed it. .5 PSI... It was a spun bearing... Had to be back in Denver in 12 hours, but that didn't happen. We put the car in storage, and caught the greyhound.... The greyhound ride itself took 12 hours... We got back to my school an hour after my class started...
Anyway, driving back, still adding oil every 300 miles, I hear a clicking sound develop... "Well, a lifter died. Definately rebuilding the head when I get back." about an hour later, the clicking was MUCH louder... I told my companion we were fine....
then, doin 75 on I-70, the clicking is audible OVER the exhaust AND music... I look at the oil pressure gauge, you geussed it. .5 PSI... It was a spun bearing... Had to be back in Denver in 12 hours, but that didn't happen. We put the car in storage, and caught the greyhound.... The greyhound ride itself took 12 hours... We got back to my school an hour after my class started...