OT:Help son got busted for 102mph
04-29-2008, 10:58 AM
#91
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My own experience with "pacing" in California was seeing a black and white in my rear view mirror as he entered from an on ramp, his full acceleration through 4 lanes of traffic to get in my blind spot, then lighting me up. He said that he had "followed me for the last 10 miles and had me at 72 mph." (this was back in the 55 mph days). I smiled. If he had been following me for the last 10 miles, he would have had me at 90+.
Not much I could say, but any inherent notion that CHP could be trusted went out the window.
Not much I could say, but any inherent notion that CHP could be trusted went out the window.
i was on my way in a white GT3 with white roll bar.
i was in the fast lane with cc set to 70mph in 65mph zone. i saw the cop far away, i maintained my speed. he sped up and then followed me in my blind spot. pulled me over after a while. asked me which on ramp i took. i told him oakland (i was at walnut creek when he pulled me over, 20+ miles away).. he said, he thought i just got up on the fwy and that if i came on the fwy at oakland, i would have been speeding at 85mph for 20+ miles (his words)...
if he was a cruising speed, and i was at 85mph, why did i not pass him after 20+ miles? he was always behind me!
anyways, i gave him my lic and reg.
he looked at it and asked who did my roll bar, complimented to bar's welds and took me to slow down and let me go (#&%)*_Q*
04-29-2008, 11:21 AM
#92
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Flash youre right the cops are never wrong or try to teach someone a lesson.
And I was looking for help which I have recieved, if thats being whiny then so beit.
Obviously you dont have kids or understand what this ticket can do you your insurance and his opportunity to get a job or insurance on his own.
I hope you need help one day so I can telly you to quit whinning.
If you dont like the thread dont read it or comment on it then it goes away.
And I was looking for help which I have recieved, if thats being whiny then so beit.
Obviously you dont have kids or understand what this ticket can do you your insurance and his opportunity to get a job or insurance on his own.
I hope you need help one day so I can telly you to quit whinning.
If you dont like the thread dont read it or comment on it then it goes away.
04-29-2008, 01:05 PM
#94
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i am now doing the same with my 3.5 year old. he drops one morsel of food on the table, i chew her out so loud my neighbor came over. no tv, no juice, no dora, no diego, no candy for a week. she learned very fast. if she cries, i leave out in the back yard for an hour until she shuts up.
Children, and the adults they are to become, cannot emotionally cope with that sort of "discipline". They will withdraw and deny their true selves in order to display the behaivior you are demanding from them, for fear of losing your love. Idealizing your own fathers flawed parenting approach does not justify your own. Kids need to know that they matter, all the time. They need to know that you take them seriously. You are instilling a sense of abandonment in them every time you leave them in the yard or "chew them out", which is the same thing your parents did to you throughout your own childhood, in one way or another. Thus the cycle of narcissistic disturbance continues from one generation to the next. Emotional well being is far too valuable; let your kids be themselves. It's only a dirty floor. Your kids are more important than a floor, or your need to abuse verbally.
For your kid's sake, you should try to take a more objective look at your parenting approach; in therapy.
Last edited by db_gt3; 04-29-2008 at 01:46 PM.
04-29-2008, 02:24 PM
#96
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I don't know enough about the facts of this other than what OG posted. I can't assume it's bull**** just as much as it's the whole truth. But from his previous posts he doesn't seem like "kill da po-lice" type so maybe hammering him here is not really necessary.
04-29-2008, 02:34 PM
#97
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Look I got the help I needed thanks everyone.
This has gone long enough. I appreciate everyones support.
I will privately give those who want it the follow up.
Thanks to you to Andrei.
This has gone long enough. I appreciate everyones support.
I will privately give those who want it the follow up.
Thanks to you to Andrei.
04-29-2008, 04:07 PM
#98
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I must advocate for your children, as they are incapable of advocating for themselves.
Children, and the adults they are to become, cannot emotionally cope with that sort of "discipline". They will withdraw and deny their true selves in order to display the behaivior you are demanding from them, for fear of losing your love. Idealizing your own fathers flawed parenting approach does not justify your own. Kids need to know that they matter, all the time. They need to know that you take them seriously. You are instilling a sense of abandonment in them every time you leave them in the yard or "chew them out", which is the same thing your parents did to you throughout your own childhood, in one way or another. Thus the cycle of narcissistic disturbance continues from one generation to the next. Emotional well being is far too valuable; let your kids be themselves. It's only a dirty floor. Your kids are more important than a floor, or your need to abuse verbally.
For your kid's sake, you should try to take a more objective look at your parenting approach; in therapy.
Children, and the adults they are to become, cannot emotionally cope with that sort of "discipline". They will withdraw and deny their true selves in order to display the behaivior you are demanding from them, for fear of losing your love. Idealizing your own fathers flawed parenting approach does not justify your own. Kids need to know that they matter, all the time. They need to know that you take them seriously. You are instilling a sense of abandonment in them every time you leave them in the yard or "chew them out", which is the same thing your parents did to you throughout your own childhood, in one way or another. Thus the cycle of narcissistic disturbance continues from one generation to the next. Emotional well being is far too valuable; let your kids be themselves. It's only a dirty floor. Your kids are more important than a floor, or your need to abuse verbally.
For your kid's sake, you should try to take a more objective look at your parenting approach; in therapy.
04-29-2008, 05:57 PM
#99
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I must advocate for your children, as they are incapable of advocating for themselves.
Children, and the adults they are to become, cannot emotionally cope with that sort of "discipline". They will withdraw and deny their true selves in order to display the behaivior you are demanding from them, for fear of losing your love. Idealizing your own fathers flawed parenting approach does not justify your own. Kids need to know that they matter, all the time. They need to know that you take them seriously. You are instilling a sense of abandonment in them every time you leave them in the yard or "chew them out", which is the same thing your parents did to you throughout your own childhood, in one way or another. Thus the cycle of narcissistic disturbance continues from one generation to the next. Emotional well being is far too valuable; let your kids be themselves. It's only a dirty floor. Your kids are more important than a floor, or your need to abuse verbally.
For your kid's sake, you should try to take a more objective look at your parenting approach; in therapy.
Children, and the adults they are to become, cannot emotionally cope with that sort of "discipline". They will withdraw and deny their true selves in order to display the behaivior you are demanding from them, for fear of losing your love. Idealizing your own fathers flawed parenting approach does not justify your own. Kids need to know that they matter, all the time. They need to know that you take them seriously. You are instilling a sense of abandonment in them every time you leave them in the yard or "chew them out", which is the same thing your parents did to you throughout your own childhood, in one way or another. Thus the cycle of narcissistic disturbance continues from one generation to the next. Emotional well being is far too valuable; let your kids be themselves. It's only a dirty floor. Your kids are more important than a floor, or your need to abuse verbally.
For your kid's sake, you should try to take a more objective look at your parenting approach; in therapy.
Dayum, I've been pissed at my kids before, but "chewing our your 3.5-year old daughter so loud that the neighbor came over"...for dropping a morsel of food on the table?
I've raised 2-kids and I now have 2-grandkids. And one thing I do know is that a child that young does not have the dexterity to keep food on the plate all the time.
And as far as "get the kid back and then BEAT the **** out of him" goes, that "kid" will remember that little gift from daddy and one day daddy will get some payback one way or another.
Discipline is one thing, but humiliation, mental anguish and physical abuse are another. Your words suggest the later.
flash1034-
StickShift964 sounds like one of those soft and sensitive guys who feels anyone speaking the truth to be a hater.
I've raised 2-kids and I now have 2-grandkids. And one thing I do know is that a child that young does not have the dexterity to keep food on the plate all the time.
And as far as "get the kid back and then BEAT the **** out of him" goes, that "kid" will remember that little gift from daddy and one day daddy will get some payback one way or another.
Discipline is one thing, but humiliation, mental anguish and physical abuse are another. Your words suggest the later.
flash1034-
StickShift964 sounds like one of those soft and sensitive guys who feels anyone speaking the truth to be a hater.
Some of you are really gullible.
But if he was being serious, then I have this to say to Mooty: “Right on Mooty, I don’t like kids either!”
Just kidding!
04-29-2008, 06:00 PM
#100
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Flash youre right the cops are never wrong or try to teach someone a lesson.
And I was looking for help which I have recieved, if thats being whiny then so beit.
Obviously you dont have kids or understand what this ticket can do you your insurance and his opportunity to get a job or insurance on his own.
I hope you need help one day so I can telly you to quit whinning.
If you dont like the thread dont read it or comment on it then it goes away.
And I was looking for help which I have recieved, if thats being whiny then so beit.
Obviously you dont have kids or understand what this ticket can do you your insurance and his opportunity to get a job or insurance on his own.
I hope you need help one day so I can telly you to quit whinning.
If you dont like the thread dont read it or comment on it then it goes away.
+1 Get em OG!
04-29-2008, 06:13 PM
#101
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I must advocate for your children, as they are incapable of advocating for themselves.
Children, and the adults they are to become, cannot emotionally cope with that sort of "discipline". They will withdraw and deny their true selves in order to display the behavior you are demanding from them, for fear of losing your love. Idealizing your own fathers flawed parenting approach does not justify your own. Kids need to know that they matter, all the time. They need to know that you take them seriously. You are instilling a sense of abandonment in them every time you leave them in the yard or "chew them out", which is the same thing your parents did to you throughout your own childhood, in one way or another. Thus the cycle of narcissistic disturbance continues from one generation to the next. Emotional well being is far too valuable; let your kids be themselves. It's only a dirty floor. Your kids are more important than a floor, or your need to abuse verbally.
For your kid's sake, you should try to take a more objective look at your parenting approach; in therapy.
Children, and the adults they are to become, cannot emotionally cope with that sort of "discipline". They will withdraw and deny their true selves in order to display the behavior you are demanding from them, for fear of losing your love. Idealizing your own fathers flawed parenting approach does not justify your own. Kids need to know that they matter, all the time. They need to know that you take them seriously. You are instilling a sense of abandonment in them every time you leave them in the yard or "chew them out", which is the same thing your parents did to you throughout your own childhood, in one way or another. Thus the cycle of narcissistic disturbance continues from one generation to the next. Emotional well being is far too valuable; let your kids be themselves. It's only a dirty floor. Your kids are more important than a floor, or your need to abuse verbally.
For your kid's sake, you should try to take a more objective look at your parenting approach; in therapy.
however, the fundamental ideology of child care and formal education differ dramatically based on culture. my raised voice, in an asian community, will never be seen as "verbal abuse". it's a summon to notify the child that we are now in a serious discussion.
crying is fine, when needed. but when a child uses crying as a lie, it is not acceptable. 3.5 yrs old may seem young to some, but it's not too early to reason with them. she now, successfully, negotiates with me with regards to her TV time, what she likes to have for dinner and her own request to see a dentist so she can eat candy and not have cavities is beyond her maturity.
i ask her to finish her food on her plate before she goes to watch dora. one night she was watching dora after dinner, came to my desk (i was on RL), she said "daddy, you didn't finish your dinner. you cannot use computer" thus you can infer that she fully understood this line of logic. so next time, if she cries for wanting to see dora but not finishing her dinner, you know she's screwing around you. then you need to put her in her place. it has nothing to do if shes 1 or 5 or 10 yr old. she KNOWS the logic. (of course, i smiled, and applauded her catching me not finishing dinner, i went back to the dinner table and stuff the horrible food down my throat). she was plenty happy to "verbally abuse" dadday.
the complex topic is difficult to discuss online. and some how i have been seen as a tyrant or abusive parent. those rennlisters who know me well and have seen mia (my 3.5yr old) knows she has more love than my entire neighborhood added together. the posts of her and my car i have shared with the community show how close we are. and the fact that she always wants to play with daddy first, makes some strange artwork and gave them to me as "presents" (she gets xmas wrapping and wrap them up too) shows that she isn't abused, far from it.
she wakes up at night every night around 4am and craws into my side of the bed, tell you something.
while it is great to let a child be a child and express their emotions, they need to be taught. a child should enjoy some TV, read a few fun book, and goto play dates. however being a child doesn't mean that she's allowed to leave her bottle everywhere, leave her jacket everywhere (she hangs her own jacket without me ever telling her b/c she watches what i do, she did that at 2.75 years old. ), eat as much candy as she wants to, or buy every toy she sees.
i told her that i dont like her to play in sand box b/c it makes her cloths and shoes and the house dirty. the next day (she's 3.25 at that time), she played in sand box, came home, sat near front door (door open).... i asked her to close the front door... she replied, "not yet, daddy, i am throwing sand out..." i can't understand that, so i went to see what she was doing and help close the door. she had her shoes off, knocking the shoe on the door steps to dump the sand out, then rubbed her hands over her jacket to get rid sand on jacket, then took a swiffer stick to swife/broom the entry (i wipe the floor every weekend, so she watched and learned).... this behavior was not taught to her. i dont need my baby to sweep the floor. but she watches the old man and copies it. my point is do not underestimate a child. if you dont "teach", "request", "discipline" them, they are 'teaching', 'conditioning', and 'disciplining' YOU. children are a lot smarter than you think, or maybe mia is just beyond believe?
she loves to throw penny into wishing wells. i always give her THREE pennies to throw. one day, trying to teach her economics, i told her that pennies can buy cookies. next time you give daddy pennies, and we go buy cookies. she goes, "i dont want cookies... " silence, twirling the pennies in her hands, dropping one, picking it up.... "can i buy candies with pennies?" i said yes. she asked "can i buy two candies, for for mia one for daddy?", i said yes, but that's two pennies for two candies. she quickly turned around, threw one penny in the water, steps off the steps, gives me TWO pennies and held my hand... "daddy, two pennies, let's get two BIG candies"....
she surprised me with that logic... so i had to stop giving her pennies. i wanted to teach her "economics" just for fun. didn't think she would get it. but she did understand, then i had to step back. teaching her "money" at this age is going to ruin her childhood. so i push the child hard, but i know when to back off.
oh, one time, a penny fell in toilet while she was getting ready to bathe. she was PISSED. ran down the stair naked... "daddy daddy daddy.... come up stairs. toilet ate my penny... no penny, no candies..." kids are smart. dont be fooled.
i have skipped numerous steps b/n nice dad and some's reference of my 'verbal abuse'. when mistakes are made, she's told that's a mistake, shown the correct method, given several chances to correct over time. then from her behavior, you make a determination as to if the child can actually grasp the concept. i dont teach her integral calculus yet, b/c she doesn't understand, only counts to 30 or so in two languages. but i have watched her repeatedly that she has full control over her food. so when she spews rice all over, she's doing it on purpose or not being careful. now if she did that b/c she's too young and cannot control her motions, certainly i would be an idiot to be upset. but when demonstrated that certain skills have been mastered and understood and yet she drops food all over, they are doing it on purpose. that is the difference.
when i do raise my voice, i am not angry about the dirty floor and i certainly am not exercising my need to "verbally abuse" anyone. those who met me or work with me, find that i am the most friendly and easily get along person they have EVER met. i am angry about her not knowing that is wrong to do what she did. then i will teach her right from wrong. once she knows right from wrong and still makes the mistake, then my anger is about her purposely doing the wrong thing. the dirty floor is just an artifact, not the reason for my discipline.
in the numerous child rearing and child psychology books i have studied to prepare for mia's arrival, "abandonment" is something mentioned over and over again. i understand it's implications though do not fully agree with the assessment. again, it's way too complicated to discuss online. often times a child with "abandonment" experiences grows up to become socially inept. but some due measure of "abandonment" does help sharpen a child's social awareness. there are many levels of "abandonment".
with absolute no "abandonment", then one example you see are children who will not sleep through the night until 5. it's very difficult to ignore crying 1 year old in middle of the night. mothers wake up to tend for them and to this day, my nephew does that still at 5 years old. if you "abandon" the child and ignore the crying at 1-2 yr old, most of them will sleep through the night. this technique is suggested by majority of the studies conducted. but isn't that "abandonment"? this is what i mean by there are many levels of "abandonment".
many kidnapping or lost children result from children wandering away from parents b/c they are not paying attention to where the parents are. they are looking at toys, ppl, various other distractions. i followed mia, she does just that. then i hid behind a large column in the mall where i can see her but she doesn't see me. i have "abandoned" her. the i see her panicking. i reappeared to tell her that she has to always know where daddy is, always ask daddy before she goes to see fish (aquarium), dora, or anything else. after that one "abandoment" episode, she got that down. now i see no negative consequences whatoever in this particular "abandonment".
when i "abandon" mia in my backyard (that's less than 200sq ft, mind you), i am not leaving her there for dead. i watch her for the entire duration to see what she is doing. so, if she fell and breaks open her skull, i'll be there.
to say that "threat" (for lack of better word), reward, discipline do not work long term, i have to disagree and it has nothing to do with my or my late father's methods. we as human being all operate under "threat", "reward" and "discipline". why dont you goto work at 3pm and come home at 330pm everyday? you can't b/c there's a "threat" that you might lose your client, or your job. there's a "threat" you will be "disciplined" and not "rewarded" at year end. why do we eat dinner ? there's a "threat" of being hungry and we may be "disciplined" by our internal organs as they "threat" to fail and shutdown. there are many examples of such in EVERYTHING we do in life. to a large extent, we operate under "threat", "reward", and "discipline" but some choose to use fancier nomenclature to disguise the real picture.
this is a thread about OG, i had my piece, and i am off the soap box.
Last edited by mooty; 04-29-2008 at 06:46 PM.
04-29-2008, 06:58 PM
#103
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Flash youre right the cops are never wrong or try to teach someone a lesson.
And I was looking for help which I have recieved, if thats being whiny then so beit.
Obviously you dont have kids or understand what this ticket can do you your insurance and his opportunity to get a job or insurance on his own.
I hope you need help one day so I can telly you to quit whinning.
If you dont like the thread dont read it or comment on it then it goes away.
And I was looking for help which I have recieved, if thats being whiny then so beit.
Obviously you dont have kids or understand what this ticket can do you your insurance and his opportunity to get a job or insurance on his own.
I hope you need help one day so I can telly you to quit whinning.
If you dont like the thread dont read it or comment on it then it goes away.
OG, If I ever post whiny, non-Porsche related stuff on this here "Water Cooled Technical Discussion, GT2/GT3 Forum", I'd expect someone, especially you, to call me on it. Now, lets get back to Porsche related good stuff and be friends again.
Flash