Joke for the day
#61
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A Blonde is watching the news with her husband when the newscaster
says 'Six Brazilian men die in a skydiving accident.' The blonde starts
crying to her husband, sobbing 'That's horrible.
'Confused, he says,'Yes dear, it is sad, but they were skydiving, and there is that risk involved.'
After a few minutes, the blonde, still sobbing, says, 'How many is a Brazilian?'
says 'Six Brazilian men die in a skydiving accident.' The blonde starts
crying to her husband, sobbing 'That's horrible.
'Confused, he says,'Yes dear, it is sad, but they were skydiving, and there is that risk involved.'
After a few minutes, the blonde, still sobbing, says, 'How many is a Brazilian?'
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#62
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A businessman got on an elevator in a building. When he entered the elevator , there was a blonde already inside and she greeted him by saying "T.G.I.F." he smiled at her , and replied, "S.H.I.T."
She looked at him, puzzled, and said "T.G.I.F." again. He acknowledged her remark again by answering "S.H.I.T."
The blonde trying to be friendly, so she smiled her Biggest smile and said as sweetly as possibly "T.G.I.F." another time. The man smiled back to her and again replied with a quizzical expression, "S.H.I.T."
The blonde finally decided to expleain things, and this time she said, "T.G.I.F. mean thank goodness its friday. get it?"
The man answered, "sorry honey its thursday."
She looked at him, puzzled, and said "T.G.I.F." again. He acknowledged her remark again by answering "S.H.I.T."
The blonde trying to be friendly, so she smiled her Biggest smile and said as sweetly as possibly "T.G.I.F." another time. The man smiled back to her and again replied with a quizzical expression, "S.H.I.T."
The blonde finally decided to expleain things, and this time she said, "T.G.I.F. mean thank goodness its friday. get it?"
The man answered, "sorry honey its thursday."
#63
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A Blonde is watching the news with her husband when the newscaster
says 'Six Brazilian men die in a skydiving accident.' The blonde starts
crying to her husband, sobbing 'That's horrible.
'Confused, he says,'Yes dear, it is sad, but they were skydiving, and there is that risk involved.'
After a few minutes, the blonde, still sobbing, says, 'How many is a Brazilian?'
says 'Six Brazilian men die in a skydiving accident.' The blonde starts
crying to her husband, sobbing 'That's horrible.
'Confused, he says,'Yes dear, it is sad, but they were skydiving, and there is that risk involved.'
After a few minutes, the blonde, still sobbing, says, 'How many is a Brazilian?'
Oh man, I have a freakin' stomach ache from that one.
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#64
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A blonde went into a world wide message center to send a message to her mother overseas. When the man told her it would cost $300, she exclaimed: "I don't have any money." But, I'd do ANYTHING to get a message to my mother!" The man arched an eyebrow (as we would expect). "Anything?" he asked. "Yes, yes, anything" the blonde promised. "Well, then, just follow me" said the man as he walked towards the next room. The blonde did as she was told and followed the man. "Come in and close the door" the man said. She did. He then said, "Now get on your knees." She did. "Now take down my zipper." She did. "Now go ahead ... take it out....." he said. She reached in and grabbed it with both hands. Then paused. The man closed his eyes and whispered ... "Well ... go ahead." The blonde slowly brought her mouth closer to it and while holding it close to her lips, ..........tentatively said ... "Hello. Mom, can you hear me?"
#66
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All I can say about the most recent joke is . . . GAWD!!! This coming from a blonde . . . oh wait . . . I have dark and platinum hairs in there nowadays -- COLLEGE!!! DAMMITTTT!!! Bob . . . send me your hair dye! ROFL.
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#70
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Quote for the day
'I haven't left my house in days. I watch the news channels incessantly. All the news stories are about the election; all the commercials are for Viagra and Cialis. Election, erection, election, erection -- either way we're getting screwed!' -------Bette Midler.
'I haven't left my house in days. I watch the news channels incessantly. All the news stories are about the election; all the commercials are for Viagra and Cialis. Election, erection, election, erection -- either way we're getting screwed!' -------Bette Midler.