A request to join the Pantheon of Slowness
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Burning Brakes
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A request to join the Pantheon of Slowness
Last year I saw a guy wearing a HWFMR tee-shirt at Sebring. I returned home and went to your website, read the wit and wisdoms, and thought, "This is me!". I spent considerable time pondering the idea of applying for membership, but did not want to rush into anything. Well, now I've collected my thoughts (a tedious, slow process), gathered my photographic evidence of worthiness, and request admission to this special group of racers.
I hope (pray?) I am uniquely worthy, as both a Central Florida Region SCCA corner-worker and an avid Suncoast Region DE'er. In my role as a corner-worker/Captain, I have had the honor of seeing some of the world's best drivers in the Rolex and ALMS. I've also thrown blue flags at some of the best. But it is at the PCA events where my skills have been honed. I've displayed so many blue flags at you HWFMR guys that it's time for my skills and assistance to be recognized. I've been the Corner Captain at Turn 5 for the last 2 Daytona PCA Club Races. On numerous occasions my blue flagger has turned to me and asked about displaying a white flag for a slow car. "Naw, it's just a HWFMR driver demonstrating his skills." Sometimes I'm overly-zealous with my blue flags. Once, without thinking about the situation, I blue-flagged the pace car (there WERE lots of faster cars behind it!). Needless to say, I was roundly admonished by the Steward...On one occasion (Turn 3 at Sebring during the 48-Hours) I had my blue-flagger display a surface flag for a car that was REALLY slow--don't know if it was one of you, but I admit the thought crossed my mind!
It is in my DE experience(s) that my true slowness emerges. I drive a 1981 911SC with a whopping 200hp. It propels me down the back-straight into Turn 17 at Sebring at a breath-taking 120mph! I'm so slow that I began to observe my Instructor's behavior while traversing the stretch from 16 to 17. One Instructor had his Blackberry out and was text-messaging his wife. Another Instructor was reading a copy of Autoweek. On several occasions I glanced over and my Instructor had dozed off. I've added new meaning to driving using my mirrors.
I often have four or five cars closely following me through a corner (see photo).
I have become the master of the point-by, so much so that I finally had to have rotater-cuff surgery last May. The Instructors got together and insisted that I start last on the grid for my run group (see photo) to give everyone else some clear track for a couple laps. My typical view through the windshield is nothing but clear track because I cannot catch anyone (see photo). My mirrors are always filled with cars that have caught up to me (see photo). The corner-workers glance up, realize it is me, and return to sitting and reading their National Inquirer (see photo) because they know it will be a lifetime before I get to their corner, and even if I spin, my slowness will negate any harm to anyone. I cannot even describe the thrill I experience when I actually get a point-by. OK, it has happened twice, and the cars were slowing down to enter the pits, but, hey, a point-by is a point-by, right? I someday hope to run at Daytona--it has an apron all the way around the banking, doesn't it??
If you believe that I have demonstrated my worthiness, the honor would be unimaginable. I promise to stay out of your way on the track and assist you with blue-flags aplenty. Should it come to pass, I leave the decision on my "Title" to you who already belong to the Pantheon...
With Baited-Breath (and Best Regards!),
Doug werth
I hope (pray?) I am uniquely worthy, as both a Central Florida Region SCCA corner-worker and an avid Suncoast Region DE'er. In my role as a corner-worker/Captain, I have had the honor of seeing some of the world's best drivers in the Rolex and ALMS. I've also thrown blue flags at some of the best. But it is at the PCA events where my skills have been honed. I've displayed so many blue flags at you HWFMR guys that it's time for my skills and assistance to be recognized. I've been the Corner Captain at Turn 5 for the last 2 Daytona PCA Club Races. On numerous occasions my blue flagger has turned to me and asked about displaying a white flag for a slow car. "Naw, it's just a HWFMR driver demonstrating his skills." Sometimes I'm overly-zealous with my blue flags. Once, without thinking about the situation, I blue-flagged the pace car (there WERE lots of faster cars behind it!). Needless to say, I was roundly admonished by the Steward...On one occasion (Turn 3 at Sebring during the 48-Hours) I had my blue-flagger display a surface flag for a car that was REALLY slow--don't know if it was one of you, but I admit the thought crossed my mind!
It is in my DE experience(s) that my true slowness emerges. I drive a 1981 911SC with a whopping 200hp. It propels me down the back-straight into Turn 17 at Sebring at a breath-taking 120mph! I'm so slow that I began to observe my Instructor's behavior while traversing the stretch from 16 to 17. One Instructor had his Blackberry out and was text-messaging his wife. Another Instructor was reading a copy of Autoweek. On several occasions I glanced over and my Instructor had dozed off. I've added new meaning to driving using my mirrors.
I often have four or five cars closely following me through a corner (see photo).
I have become the master of the point-by, so much so that I finally had to have rotater-cuff surgery last May. The Instructors got together and insisted that I start last on the grid for my run group (see photo) to give everyone else some clear track for a couple laps. My typical view through the windshield is nothing but clear track because I cannot catch anyone (see photo). My mirrors are always filled with cars that have caught up to me (see photo). The corner-workers glance up, realize it is me, and return to sitting and reading their National Inquirer (see photo) because they know it will be a lifetime before I get to their corner, and even if I spin, my slowness will negate any harm to anyone. I cannot even describe the thrill I experience when I actually get a point-by. OK, it has happened twice, and the cars were slowing down to enter the pits, but, hey, a point-by is a point-by, right? I someday hope to run at Daytona--it has an apron all the way around the banking, doesn't it??
If you believe that I have demonstrated my worthiness, the honor would be unimaginable. I promise to stay out of your way on the track and assist you with blue-flags aplenty. Should it come to pass, I leave the decision on my "Title" to you who already belong to the Pantheon...
With Baited-Breath (and Best Regards!),
Doug werth
Last edited by dmw44; 10-27-2007 at 05:44 PM.
#2
Banned
Based on the second picture in this series above (drag racing the golf cart, where not only is Mr. Werth pointed in the WRONG DIRECTION ("Wrong Way Werth"??) or has spun? (Notice the helmet on the golf cart drivers melon)) - as well as the anecdotal information regarding his previous instructors - I would endorse this application.
I would also submit - that NOT ONE picture is blurry - attesting to the slow - yet deliberate speed of Mr. Werth's efforts on the track.
Of course, Doug - my endorsement may, or may not - be slowly over-ridden......
John D.
I would also submit - that NOT ONE picture is blurry - attesting to the slow - yet deliberate speed of Mr. Werth's efforts on the track.
Of course, Doug - my endorsement may, or may not - be slowly over-ridden......
John D.
#3
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Okay . . . you are from Florida . . . Gators or Seminoles? The answer will determine my vote (though, we don't actually vote here).
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Hmmm, it seems to me that having a flag station Captain in our pocket....er, on the team could have certain advantages! I have a couple of unimpeachable sources that indicate that Mr. Werth is in no way exaggerating about his qualifications. Besides, anyone who tracks an SC Targa can't possibly be a speed crazed drover.
While it is quite unlike me to argue with anyone, let alone His Exaltedness John D., I say that he is mistaken about the drag race picture. It actually shows a drag race that is over and the golf cart drover is standing by waiting to collect his winnings now that Mr. Werth has finally reached the finish area.
So, high potential here....but I think we need to see more pictures and a video or two. Otherwise, VR gets cranky if he has to read the words, particularly if you are going to use words like Pantheon.
While it is quite unlike me to argue with anyone, let alone His Exaltedness John D., I say that he is mistaken about the drag race picture. It actually shows a drag race that is over and the golf cart drover is standing by waiting to collect his winnings now that Mr. Werth has finally reached the finish area.
So, high potential here....but I think we need to see more pictures and a video or two. Otherwise, VR gets cranky if he has to read the words, particularly if you are going to use words like Pantheon.
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#6
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I think he qualifies. Besides, he can spell and we need someone besides TD to write long posts.
Best,
Best,
#7
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I threw my cane aside young fella....it was getting in the way of my walker, would get all tangled up, then rap me in the nu...well, you understand, I'm sure.
Last edited by Bull; 10-27-2007 at 07:22 PM.
#9
Burning Brakes
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So, umm, Bonni, do you have a preference you'd like to share at this time??
That was a golfcart that I pointed-by? I was trying to figure out what model P-car that was, but he went by too fast--this explains a lot...
I searched my files for a picture of my car in a blur of speed, but, alas, came up empty...
Yeah, but the Targa has a fiberglass top!!
Did I mention that I promise to give HWFMR drivers special preference at whatever corner I'm on???
That was a golfcart that I pointed-by? I was trying to figure out what model P-car that was, but he went by too fast--this explains a lot...
I searched my files for a picture of my car in a blur of speed, but, alas, came up empty...
Yeah, but the Targa has a fiberglass top!!
Did I mention that I promise to give HWFMR drivers special preference at whatever corner I'm on???
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Hey Flag Waggin Werth, I gradutated from SCCA Flaggers School in the very early '70s. Anything changed since then....pay, perks, etc.?
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Hey Doug, maybe you saw me in turn 5. Here's a photo to refresh your memory, which I assume is pretty slow too.
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Larry Herman
2016 Ford Transit Connect Titanium LWB
2018 Tesla Model 3 - Electricity can be fun!
Retired Club Racer & National PCA Instructor
Past Flames:
1994 RS America Club Racer
2004 GT3 Track Car
1984 911 Carrera Club Racer
1974 914/4 2.0 Track Car
CLICK HERE to see some of my ancient racing videos.
Larry Herman
2016 Ford Transit Connect Titanium LWB
2018 Tesla Model 3 - Electricity can be fun!
Retired Club Racer & National PCA Instructor
Past Flames:
1994 RS America Club Racer
2004 GT3 Track Car
1984 911 Carrera Club Racer
1974 914/4 2.0 Track Car
CLICK HERE to see some of my ancient racing videos.