It started very innocently one day early this summer. My new-to-me '96 polar silver C2 coupe was sitting, just delivered, in my driveway. It was just past dawn, and birdsong filled the crisp, virgin air (punctuated only by me yelling at the ones who dared fly too close) and the morning dew had settled delicately - trickling in places - on those voluptuous silver curves that had become, finally, a part of my dominion.

Everything was perfect.

Except...for that silly nick in the rear bumper. I missed that in the PPI. Must've been done
in a parking lot, as were the three small door dings I had subsequently started to count.
I cursed the previous owner. How could he have been so careless.
"Once I get that bumper resprayed and those dings rubbed out, THEN it'll be perfect"
I muttered.

Then, one day I noticed the toothless grin of the third brake light (whose bulbs aren't all working) when backing up past the reflection of a window in my office parking lot. Damn.
Once that's fixed, my 993, and therefore my life, will be perfect.
But presently I found my eyes soothed by the organic lines of those shiny Cup2 17's.
Once I repair that little scuff on the passenger side rear rim...It'll be perfect, I postulated.
But I'd need help with such a task.

So I followed some advice and started reading postings on a friendly and helpful website forum devoted to cars just like mine.

Except....their cars WEREN'T just like mine.

They had things called "M030's" and "RSRs" "Splitters", "Aerokits" "Big Reds" and 18'
and 19' rims and "chips" their cars were lower. And noisier, and faster. (One even got a ticket for going 110 MPH!).
And I found myself drowning in self pity. Perhaps if I do all of those things to my pedestrian unmolested little coupe, maybe then, THEN it will be perfect, I gasped.

My question is: Is this normal?

Thanks.

 

Stop worrying/complaining; just get in that sucker and enjoy the drive.

 

Kim,
Whats truly amazing, is that you can remember all that!

I'm glad my car is stock, I could never keep track of mods

 

I want to ZAINO the engine bay( thats my story, and I'm stick'in to it)

 

Zaino!?! Personally, I would use Klasse and Blitz for the engine bay. Make sure you use a micro fibre and are not in direct sunlight.

 

See what can happen Matt.

this slope is very slippery!!

For me it started with a simple gear shift ****/boot. I think I have most of the stuff Kim has, cept the 3.8 and the 2nd car

 

My other question is:
If we could certify this as some type of psychological disorder,
do you think we could get our HMO's to cover some of these mods??

 

Matt,

Here's the advice of an old codger... get off this board and do not look back. Its kinds like going into a stereo shop and doing "A - B" comparison tests of speakers... you always end up with far more than you bargained for. The guys on this board are a little like crack dealers, except there is no profit. They just tantalize you with the list of mods "you MUST have" until you're hooked. Never, I mean NEVER, take your car to an autocross or D.E. event. You will discover a never-ending list of things that will make you just a tiny bit faster for the next time. Until you have a gutted, full caged, on-board fire-system, fuel cell, and air jacked Porsche. Ask me how I know.

So, keep your car stock. Well, except that you really ought to get the shocks replaced , and while you're in there, do some springs. Got a strut-tower brace yet? Short shift kit? Some nifty Aero stuff? How's that clutch? Ready for a light-weight flywheel? Have you thought about the RS mounts? A euro-geared gearbox?

Oh. Sorry.

 

Isn't it nice to come a visit Rennlist. A quiet place where there are only a couple hundred folk who take glee in leading/dragging you down that slippery slope.

Had I not discovered Rennlist whould I ever have heard of Gert and Euro bumper covers? Steve and chips, PSS-9s, RS-sway bars and the like? Viken or DJ and close-ratio gearing or LWFs?

And then Kim. Kim forced me to buy the track car. I swear. I had nothing to do with it. I told my wife it was for safety equipment.

 

That's the other thing. How do you get
this stuff past your wives/spouses????????
Mine thinks removing, stripping and repainting a scratched
bumper at a high-end repair facility is excessive/obsessive.

 

Matt,

You're asking us? Well, then, yes, you're completely normal and very safe in here, locked up with all of the other lunatics.

I sold an '85 Carrera to get my 993. Wanted more speed and a nicer car, I told myself. It was a fair chunk of change to spend but I was going to stop at this big ticket item. Yes, stop, I say. But once I bought my car, I realized I needed a new suspension. Okay, fair enough, active safety is extremely critical . The Bilstein HD shocks and stock springs wouldn't do, though. I had to have the PSS9's and RS bars since I was going to track the car two or three times a year. Well, those two or three DE's became seven or eight DE's and, in addition to the engine chip, RSR mufflers, DAS rollbar, fire extinguisher and Xpel clear bra that were my supposed stopping point, I bought R compound Michelins, Fikse 18" wheels ,a brake bleeder, more jack stands, a racing jack, helmet, gloves, driving shoes, and an aluminum trailer. I know I'm missing about a thousand dollars worth of "must-haves" including the Pagid or Hawk brake pads that are mandatory for track driving.

I was lucky to have found used GT3 seats with Sabelt harnesses, currently serving a tour of duty in my living room. I was even luckier to have found a cheap set of used Toyo RA-1 rain tires that I had to have since, if I am as serious about track driving as I think I am, why of course there will be events where it may be raining like crazy. Can't let my hard-earned money be wasted by not driving in the rain, now can I? Lest I forget, the used set of Supercup mufflers that I was fortunate to have snagged for free was a virtual buyer's reward freebie from the track gods to reinforce my behavior. BTW, is anyone selling a Cargraphic oil cooler? Seriously.

It's time for your medication, Matt...

<EDIT> add Gert's fpb and Elephant Racing's track skins to that list.

 

The guys on this board are a little like crack dealers, except there is no profit.


Just give it more time...married people take a little longer to get there...

Matt,
This is how Kim works us.......Plants a seed......throws some water on it.....and then it becomes a " I GOTTA HAVE IT"

But I do want to help you so here you go

Gert

Steve

Then of course there is our Friend from Texas Glen (be very very afraid of him)

 

(1) If you have a wife, she must be understanding. Years together prior to the addiction helps her be more tolerant. I've heard bribery with trinkets can help too. She might get suspicous if she sees a pattern of flowers for her because she's wonderful and the next day a box arrives for you, but the flowers never, ever hurt.

(2) If you can get her involved (mine likes to autocross) it helps immensely. It's getting her to do the autocross school that can take a lot of work.

(3) If you bust a few bones a few times from other adrenaline inducing activities, it makes the "safety" argument a lot easier. This is a painful way to accomplish a goal, but it does help.

 

Matt
There are a number of mental illnesses reportedly associated with 993 ownership. Porsche Slippery Slope Syndrome ("PSSS") is one. Some others are PPMS & PLCS. To better handle your affliction, you might print out the thread below from almost 2 years ago (which was ironically prompted by a post from another Matt) and share it with your therapist. BTW, PSSS generally follows the other two, by which time the condition is almost impossible to control.


Any psychiatrists out there?

 

Ok, I am attorney by trade...did the big firm thing...long hours...hated it. German in nationality, grew up with the saying "wear Italian, kiss French and drive German". So, my childhood was filled with the parents german autos...Porsche, Benz, BMW. Ok, so I become hooked, subscribe to Dupont Regisrty, Excellence Magazine..you know the usual.

16 years old...1977 Benz 280E...loaded...moms old car...like butter.

20 years old...1987 911 Cabrio...Diamond blue met., color coded wheels, blue top and interior.

24 years old...1992 C2 Turbo...white, cobalt blue leather...all stock.

29 years old...1994 3.6 Turbo...black on black...all stock.

32 SL500 sport...brilliant silver..black leather...AMG muffler.

34 1989 911 Turbo...velvet red met.,....tan leather...stock...8,200miles..mint.

Today...1998 993 C2S...zenith blue met...gray leather...sports seats...sport suspension..limited slip...motorsound..big ovals...factory aero kit...RSR mufflers.

Ok, I digress, quit the practice of law and bought into Exotic Car Enterprises, Inc located in Chicago...foreign car body and repair facility!! Was a loyal customer that got hooked!! All car lovers in Chicago please stop by!! 935 West Willow in Chicago!! (like the address...hehe)

Rennlist a big reason!


SLIPPERY SLOPE INDEED!!