SR71BLACKBIRD

:-(

Arena993

Scott:

I wish I had some advice to give, but I do not. I just wanted you to know that we will keep your Father and your family in our prayers. If there was ever a time that someone needed compassion it is in your Father's situation. Some people out there have no respect as it pertains to others. I would follow through as best you can, but keep the focus on your Father. I am really sorry to hear this.

Mike

Speedyellow993

What a F-ing ***! That guy must think he is House MD like on tv. Call the hospital and Request another doctor and explain what happened. I'd be careful about a direct confrontation as it might compromise your fathers care.

GL and all the best.

jdistefa

Scott,

Gastric cancer is an unfortunate diagnosis and a 'cure' is difficult even when the tumour is caught early. Partial gastrectomy is usually the surgical approach, but when things spread an operation simply becomes a way to kill the patient earlier than the cancer.

Chemo is not unreasonable as a strategy to debulk the tumour and buy time. It all boils down to quality of life - i.e. will you gain a few weeks/months on chemo but feel ****ty all the time, versus enjoy the time left without the potentially nasty side effects of treatment?

Whatever the choice, your father will still need nutrition, which may require a G or J-tube. Adequate nutrition can be just as big a factor in maximizing his survival time as chemo. If he's having trouble swallowing pills, it sounds like you need to look at options in this regard.

Lastly, pain control (opiods) and bowel management (avoiding constipation from the pain meds) will also be key factors re. quality of life.

Now - on the last and most important topic - this doctor's behaviour. Personally, I find it embarassing to the profession, and anyone caring for Oncology patients who behaves like that needs to have their head re-arranged with a 2x4. I'm sorry you are having to deal with that on top of your father's illness.

I've PM'd you my phone number and I'm happy to help both re. connecting you to the BC College of Physicians and Surgeons and with sourcing a second opinion/alternate physician.

Regards,
Matt

Chuck W.

I am so sorry to hear about your father. Being a distance away makes it even harder. I lost both my parents to cancer.

I would look at changing doctors if that is an option. If not, I would be on the phone to him. However, I don't think anything will change his conduct. Good luck and keep us posted.

wpriller

I lost my father to stomach cancer about 4yrs ago, 3 days before Father's Day.
My father also had a rude Oncologist that didn't seem to care. The only thing that I would suggest is talking to the Physician and just voice your concerns, you will probably see a change in his attitude as he continues to treat your Dad. Your family are in my prayers, and be strong for your Dad & Mom.

AOW162435

Scott,
I'm very sorry to read this. First and foremost - I would not waste a moment letting the doctor know of your disappointment. Your father's immediate health and pain management is of paramount importance - hopefully a more-caring specialist can be located ASAP.

I will keep him in my thoughts.


Andreas

vjd3

Terrible experience. My wife is an oncologist. She suggests:

1) Report the guy to the highest official at the hospital where he works.
2) Report him to the licensing authority.
3) Include specifics -- dates, exact words.
4) Get a new doctor.
5) Send your brother, as the jerk is unlikely to bully another male like that.

And to which I would add, hit the sonofabitch in the face with a shovel at your earliest opportunity.

Dudley

My stepfather went through a very similar illness. He opted for the chemo treatment. The treatment extended his life several months but he and my mother suffered miserably during this period.
My personal choice would be to find a more compassionate care-giver and opt for the path offering the most quality of life.

I wish your father and your family the best in dealing with this devastating disease.

Wilder

Scott, this is a sad situation and my heart goes out to you and your family. I'm not in the medical field but I am in Vancouver. Let me know if I can help.

Ed Burdell

No one should be subjected to needless unpleasantries at a time like this, and certainly not from one's own doctor.

I'll supply the 2x4 and shovel...

Flying Finn

Go up there, now.

Your father and mother need your help.

OCJoe

Take the action Vic (vjd3 )suggested.
I'm a survivor and your doc has to go down.
YOU need to take action now.

"this to shall pass"
cheers,
joe

TRINITONY

go see ur dad asap, he needs you, there's only one ...

NC TRACKRAT

It is indeed sad that some physicians are hypocrites rather than adhering to the Hippocratic Oath. Sometimes I wonder if some of them took a course in egomania. Sure wish that he and your Dad could change places. You have my sincere empathy.