Did anyone catch it? Rick Mercer was on talking about being gay in high school, and the bullying that accompanies it. I didn't want to revive our recent thread on the topic (though I have a hard time not thinking about it almost daily), but this is something that has really stayed in the news lately, and I'm really glad about that.

When I was in high school (1990-1995, yes I did a "victory lap" ) bullying wasn't really a problem, at least not as far as I knew. There was one loser who was a tough kid who knew how to fight, and was big, so he threw his weight around, but if you steered clear of him, he left you alone. I had a few kids pick on me, but nothing I couldn't handle. I couldn't imagine going through what some of these kids are going through.

My 2 daughters are just starting into the school system (5 year old in SK and an almost 3 year old who will start JK next year) and I really hope that all this discussion leads to some action. I can't imagine them facing any of the kinds of stuff I'm hearing about.

Here's Rick Mercer's interview with Anna Maria Tremonti:
http://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/story/...interview.html

 

Chris,

I've had similar feelings as you on this topic lately. I am glad it's getting some much deserved attention. I was bullied at elementary school. There were about 6 visible minorities at my school during those days. I was the token brown guy at an all white school. Let me tell you, it was no fun.

I'm glad people are stepping up and giving a voice to those too scared to speak. But I can see it in my own kids - the big one doesn't like confrontation, so if someone is hassling her, she tends to step away. We've been lucky that with a little coaching and encouragement, she's been able to stand up to the wee ****ebags in her class.

It comes down to parenting and giving your kids the tools to stand up for themselves. It's a tough job this parenting business.

 

I'm glad to hear this is a topic of discussion! Thanks guys!

 

Thank you for being brave enough to share your story.

 

"It's a tough job this parenting business."

My son is in grade 9 and just today got into a fight with a hockey bully.
In gym class he pushed my son to the ground twice, the second time my son's head hit the gym floor, and that's when my son clocked him, and things got out of control.
This confused young boy is taught that checking and fighting are acceptable in one arena, and then in the real world that behaviour is not accepted, hence the confusion. Hockey is our National sport.

Both of them were suspended, cause there is zero tolerance.
Hopefully this Bully will think twice about who he pushes around next time.

 

In my daughters words: "first year of high school hits you like a brick in the face". The social life that our kids have to deal with is a lot harder than what we were dealing with. They get hustled for everything: from what they wear to what they eat for lunch. And it doesn't stop after school. Cyber-bullying can be just as damaging as face-to-face encounter.

Keep an eye on their computer activities, fellas.

Hope your kid is ok, Eshel.

 

Thanks for posting this, Chris. As a psychologist, I often meet with adults who have a history of being bullied as a child, and I can assure you that it can leave a deep and lasting pain. Moreover, the shame of being the victime of bullying can lead kids not to talk with adults about what's going on, greatly compounding the problem. Listen to your kids!

Bill

 

What's Radio 1?

 

I started elementary school at private school. We had small classes, between 8 and 12 kids, usually. There was a high proportion of brown kids in those classes, but I can honestly say I remember growing up thinking it was the same as brown or red hair. However I do remember that there was usually one kid who got picked on. It changed every year, but it was more to do with their personality than colour.

And also giving them the tools to understand other kids for being different, and accept them as such (i.e. to not be a perpetrator).

+ a million

Hmm, really good point. Is 14 too young to differentiate between the ice and the playground? I don't know - I'm genuinely asking.
[/QUOTE]

CBC Radio 1. You know, radio?

 

I've been thinking a lot about the kid that we all picked on in elementary school. I never really took part in the bullying, but I never stood up for him either. Group psychology is a strange and complex thing. My class mates would pick on this kid day in, day out. Then at soccer practice, he was one of the team. Of course, the parents were all around but it was bizarre that he'd be the hero on the field on Tuesday night, then end up at the bottom of a pile-on Wednesday morning.

Parents need to ask A LOT of questions to really find out what's going on.

I'm really glad there's starting to be some attention paid to the bullies themselves. It's one thing to look after the victims but, if we're ever going to end it, we need to know what's running through the bullies' minds.

 

He's resilient Stan, thanks for asking. Had an acupuncture appt today, Dr. said his neck was stiff, much better, he has a golf lesson right now.

Re His cell phone, it's not really a phone but a perpetual texting device, that is now Gone! If the girls want to speak to him, they can do it the old fashion way.

 

"Hmm, really good point. Is 14 too young to differentiate between the ice and the playground? I don't know - I'm genuinely asking."

I think so, and I'm not the first parent to experience this.

If there is a bright side to all this mess, is that my son asked to resume taking Karate.