When I walk out to the Pepper and disarm the alarm open the door I immediately hear what sounds like some mechanical device almost like the sound of a suspension changing height (AIR) or a higher pitched electric seat sound. It only lasts a couple seconds so I can't localize it quick enough. Any ideas?

FYI....I do NOT have the air suspension on the Pepper.

 

Fuel pump pressurization........it's been asked before.

 

Damn....if I had only searched for "fuel pump pressurization"

 

j/k Lewis.....thanks for the input

 

Or it could be a bomb.......no wait, that was only installed by PCNA in my previous Cayenne, never mind. Let's stick with fuel pump for now.

 

OK ltc, I am new to the forum and I can't seem to find what happened or what didn't happen to your Cayenne ? I am very intrigued. Sorry and I don't mean to Hijack this thread but ...Can you explain what happened and scare the crap out of us ? I might regret asking this.......

 

are you sitting down? grab some kool-aid and read a few threads of history

03-11-2006, 01:11 AM
MadFox
Addict
Rennlist Member
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Alabama USA
Posts: 829 Twas the night before ltc said Good Night!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Twas the night before Saturday when all through the forum,
Every thread poster could see it coming, even ltc’s harem!
Cayenne owners were posting problems which needed care
In hopes that the “guru” ltc soon would be there.

Ltc’s children were nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of dad’s late night typing was still in their heads;
And wifey in her gown and ltc in his straight jacket,
finally headed to bed after telling the forum PAG can’t hack it.

When a knock on the front door created such a clatter
That ltc sprang from the bed to see what was the matter.
Away to the door he flew like a rocket,
Tore open the FedEx to see what was in the pocket!

The moon on the legal letterhead created such a glow,
Gave the luster of midday and made ltc’s jaw drop so low,
When, what to his wondering eyes should appear
But an exclamation point and no lights anywhere near!

With a little scared driver of the FedEx van running so quick
He knew in a moment that it was probably St. Peter the *****.

More rapid than eagles the Cayenne glitches they came,
And he whistled and shouted and called them by name:
Now, a/c solenoid, now key fob, now shimmy, now rear hatch glitch,
On cowboy belt buckle on, on ignition coils, on and that darn trailer hitch!

To the depths of poor service PAG began to take a big fall,
But, they tried to wish it away, wish it away, wish it away ALL!

Now as owners began to see extended warranties no longer fly,
ltc’s whimsical advice in the forum began to reach up to the sky,

But, then, while at the villa and laying a finger aside of his nose
the nurse jammed a needle in his *** until he arose,
He sprang from his Cayenne and into his nine, nine, six
And said why in the hell have I put up with this schitz?

And we read his final post as he drove out of sight,
Sipping on Kool-Aid and about to turn out the light,
To my Cayenne buddies who always thought that I wasn’t “right” --
All I can say, “ is this things got lights and to that Cayenne Good Night!”

I salute your contributions. You will me missed. MadFox

**** p.s. The forum members at the time.. then granted a lifetime exemption to posting in the cayenne forum even tho' he is an EX-Cayenne-aholic.. he comes to the meetings with medications!

 

Dell,
I'd like to change my previous answer of 'fuel pump'.

Actually, it is the sound of the blender mixing up a batch of Purplesaurus Rex Kool-Aid.

Final answer.

 

Cayenne? Me? What happened to it?
I never owned a Cayenne, never. Never owned it, never sold it. Nothing but vicious lies and inuendo.

Now, submitted for your comic relief, a blast from the past.......





*************************************
Dateline: North Pole.
Headline: Christmas delayed due to Cayenne towing issue, lawsuits filed.

In a stunning disappointment for children (and adults who act like children) around the world, Kris Kringle stated today at a web conference that due to a 'towing incompatiblility issue' between his reindeer sled and his recently purchased Cayenne tow vehicle, Christmas may be delayed.

Details are still coming in at this time, but this is what we know so far.....

The issue began when Mr Kringle (d/b/a Santa Claus) decided to hook up reindeer sleigh up to his newly acquired Porsche Cayenne for this year's toy delivery trip around the world.

Immediately upon attaching the reindeer sleigh to the 7 pin Pollack connector, a "!" Check Trailer Lights warning message was displayed on the dashboard of the Cayenne and Rudolph's red nose went out, along with the headlights on the Cayenne, leaving him in total darkness.

Mr Kringle did due diligence by referring to the owner's manual, while Mrs Kringle administered CPR to Rudolph while the other reindeer watched in horror. Rudolph's condition is not known at this time.

Upon finding NO reference to the "!" Check Trailer Lights message ANYWHERE in the owner's manual, Mr Kringle then called Porsche Roadside Assistance, as time was of the essence to get the Cayenne on the road, now that Rudolph's future was in doubt.

Upon reaching Porsche Roadside assistance, Mr Kringle described the problem in detail and was immediately transferred to PCNA Legal in Atlanta.

PCNA Legal in Atlanta, after conferring with PCNA Front Desk Engineering, told Mr Kringle the following:

1. The Porsche Cayenne was NOT designed to be compatible with red nose reindeer lighting systems.
2. By connecting a reindeer sleigh to the Porsche Cayenne, he had immediately voided his warranty.
3. He was then told, and I quote: "Stuff It Fat Man".

Mr Kringle, left with no other recourse, consulted his "whose been naught and whose been nice" list and contacted Rennlist Cayenne forum member "ltc"; (it is NOT known which list "ltc" was on: naughty or nice.)

"ltc" was unable to provide any assistance regarding the Cayenne but was able to put Mr Kringle in touch with legal counsel to help resolve the issue.
"ltc" also offered the services of his 2005 Ford Excursion Eddie Bauer edition 6.0l PowerStroke diesel to tow the reindeer sleigh, as unlike the Cayenne, this vehicle has no issue with reindeer sleigh lighting attached to its 7 pin Pollack connector.

Mr Kringle then thanked "ltc" and asked one further question:
"Would you happen to know the address of PCNA President Peter Schwarenbauer?" to which "ltc" replied, "as a matter of fact, yes I do"
Mr Kringle, smiling, said: "Are you busy AFTER Christmas Eve? Would you like to take a trip to Atlanta with me and the Elves known as Vito, Vinnie and Nunzio?"...to which "ltc" replied...."how did you know what I wanted for Christmas?"

At this time, legal counsel for Mr Kringle are filing class action lawsuits on behalf of:
Rudolph's family
Children (and adults who act like children) from around the world
All Cayenne owners with option 1D6 (factory tow option)

We will post further details as they become available.
*************************************

Happy Holidays to everyone in the Cayenne forum....in my own 'special' way.

 

Pour me a glass hermano!

 

Hijacking a thread is REQUIRED here in the Cayenne forum.
NO thread is allowed to go for more than 2 replies before being 'derailed'.

 

Wait a minute....you're the guy who drinks the expensive stuff, aren't you?
At two, you're through.
Where the hell is that damned bartender......oh MadFox, you have a customer.

 

Damn, I am sorry to say but "I am crying in my cube right now." That is a horrible story but yet the way you tell it, "Funny as ****." God I beg of you...please no "!" Mystery unveiled.. Thanks

 

BTW - I knew I came to the right place to start drinking again

 

If you're laughing, you'll be fine.
I normally get extra credit for getting people to shoot milk/coffee thru their nose when they read the threads.

Submitted for your approval, some classic Cayenne Forum T shirt designs, by artist/bartender MadFox, commemorating:

https://rennlist.com/forums/attachme...chmentid=99040
https://rennlist.com/forums/attachme...hmentid=115220

MPG

"keyfobs with range so short you ended up throwing them at the Cayenne, hoping the door would open"

the "rear window microswtich, revised/replaced FOUR times before the hatch would stop opening all by itself"

our Forum Mascot, the KoolAid Purplesaurus Rex

the "tight fitting pajama top I had to wear"

the "#2 pencil I used to type with, since I was 'strapped down to the bed' in the 'vacation villa'

the State of Hawaii, who "ate MadFox's aftermarket warranty"

the Cayenne forum members giving PAG/PCNA the "Cayenne Forum 'Salute'"

and last but not least........the "!"


Welcome aboard.