Having owned several Porsche's over the years, buying one and *thinking* the wife will drive it is a mistake. You need to determine ahead of time if she's interested and let her go with you to test drive some examples. As mentioned, she may find it too small, too fast, too expensive, too "yours" that she won't feel comfortable driving it, even if she can drive it.

Buy the car you want. At least then, 1 of you will be happy.

As for the TIP, I've autocrossed a friends Boxster S TIP.. and taken FTD with it a couple of times. Its nice not having to worry about ****ing (oops, shifting) when AXing, and makes left foot braking much easier too, at least on a car without PSM.

 

What about those 2009 carrara white/gray C2 pdk launch cars? There are some listed on Ebay regularly. That might be a perfect compromise. Right colors for him, pdk. Most important, even as much as the pdk/tip comparison, is that the BASE Carrera (C2) in 2009+ is much more powerful than the earlier base C2's. Big upgrade!
In fact, there is a brand new unsold white 2009 C2 at a nearby dealer (Vin Devers in Toledo) that I bet might even go for 65K or less by now!!
It doesn't have sprts chrono, the one compromise.

 

Trade her in on a newer model that drives stick?

 

Or trade her in one that has her own car.