OCBen

You kidding me, I loved his esoteric references and witty jabs. I was one of the few in my circle of friends who got most of his references. I think MNF's website on the day after the game used to break down Dennis' quotes and explain his references for those who didn't get it.

Here's a few of my favorite quotes from MNF:

"Big deal, so he scored. The last time I saw someone dance like that I had to pay her $20 and have my pants dry cleaned the next day."

"Of *course* he needs to renegotiate his salary -- the guy buys more snow than Seward did when he bought Alaska from the Russians."

"That receiver was as wide open as Annabel Chong." ---> (She's a **** star.)

"Ray Lewis knifed through those offensive linemen like a sucker-punch switchblade slicing between the ribs of some inebriated trash-talking punk outside a sports bar."

"I've seen better coverage at an Alan Keyes press conference."

"The Cowboy's defense has more holes in it than Ronny Milsapp and Jose Feliciano after a game of lawn darts."

"The punt returner got smacked like Nancy Kerrigan's knee on souvenir pipe night."

"That secondary provides worse coverage than a Guatemalan HMO."

"He lasted about as long as the dessert tray at Rosie O'Donnell's house."

"Concussion? How the hell can they tell? They're *football* players, for chrissakes!"

"Is it just me, or are the 49ers doing an awful lot of ***-patting today?"

"Their offense is shakier than Katherine Hepburn after an all-night espresso bender at Starbucks."

"I haven't seen someone so overmatched since Mike Tyson tried to recite the alphabet."

"Check out the helmet hair on Randy Moss, babe! He looks like some freakish anti-Mr. T after a long evening sleeping through 'Aida.'"

"That kid's got an arm like Uncle Fester at an exhibition of Pre-Colombian... um, Christ, I lost it. I was going for something thick. So what's with the beard, Grizzly Fouts?"

"Ouch! And Marino goes down quicker than his Boonesfarm-infused sister in the back of my '68 Cutlass on our first date after watching 'Love Story' at the drive-in."

"I haven't seen anyone rely on the ground game this much since the battle of Verdun."

"The quarterback's spending so much time behind the center that he may jeopardize his right to lead a Boy Scout troop."

"I've seen women pee standing up with better aim."

"Somebody call Janet Reno -- I think I just saw Donato dragging Doug Flutie into a locker room closet!"

"That field goal attempt was so far to the left it nearly decapitated Lyndon LaRouche."

"Hey, Cunningham -- Andy Warhol called. You're at 14:55 and we're tickin' big-time here, Chachi."

"Hey Deion, Bubbelah -- maybe you'd better pay a little less attention to those unfairly Draconian salary caps that only allowed you to acquire four of the five remaining 1932 Aston Martins still in road-worthy condition after you'd paid for life's little necessities like hookers and weed, get your medulla oblongata out of your duodenum for a few milliseconds, and make a tackle or two, okay, Babe?"

"When the hell is Warren Moon going to retire? I mean, this guy is older than the cuneiform in Nebuchadnezzar's tomb."

"That punt was higher than Marion Berry on a fact-finding tour of Cartagena."

"Nervous? He's tighter than Pat Buchanan's sphincter muscle at a 4th of July soiree on Fire Island."

"Warner had more hands in his face than an OB-GYN delivering Vishnu's triplets!"

allegretto

These are very funny. DO you actually remember all of these?

WHy do you think they nixed him? Ratings or the other guys in the booth?

OCBen

You kiddin' me, no way! I dug those up online.

ABC only brought him onboard in the hope that it would stop the slide in MNF ratings, thinking that going back to what once was a sure formula for ratings success (i.e. having a colorful personality - Cosell) would restore MNF to its glory days. But that was a long, long time ago and the television landscape had changed drastically since then, as was proven by the continued slip in ratings until eventual cancellation last season, even after putting together the dream team of Madden & Michaels.

Deanski

You mean that white GT3 that now looks good as new? I remember that mess.

I was up at Limerock on Saturday and Danbury had several Cayman S's and boxters that we could go out on the track and play so long as one of the Pro drivers/instructors was along. I had a black Cayman S and that's one fast little car! It impressed the hell out of me! Too bad I couldn't get my car on the track as it didn't have the safety inspection.

Ronmart:

You're baby will be back good as new very soon! At least you were a gentleman about it! That's one thing I'm scared about, so no one drives my car as this is my one and only dream car.

Regards,
Deanski

fluid15

Ron, Sorry to hear about your car, but glad that you're understanding about it. I probably would be more upset about it than you but you're right - accidents happen. I guess I can handle it if the accident is my fault, but not as much if it was someone elses. That's why I typically didn't let other people drive my P-cars (my wife would drive if I had a few drinks too many).

ronmart

I chose a good place to do my work and one cool thing is that they have real-time status of the work on my car:

http://www.qcautobody.com/Tracker/default.aspx?RO=26925

which includes pictures of the progress:

http://www.qcautobody.com/progress_p...3-2006_1_Y.jpg

Which is cool, but it is also like watching your wife getting assaulted - very painful!!! UGH!!!!

They also are using a car cover on the car to keep it from getting messed up, but Deanski and OCBen will know what went through my mind the minute I saw that. I don't know which is worse - having it, or not having it!