gota911

I echo what Phil said in his second post. This is concerning Drew. It sounds like your friends got married and you were "cut out" because singles and married couples don't mix very well. Just different priorities and life styles.

When you are happy, what type of people are you around? Get involved with the local PCNA (Porsche Club of North America) group and maybe drive the 110 miles to the track a couple of times. You might enjoy it more than you thought you would. In the mean time, go hang out with some friends. or better yet, talk with someone that you trust and are close with. Either way, talk with people and interact with them.

Van

I'm not doctor or medical professional, so my advice is for novelty purposes only...

My wife was going through a similar thing recently (minus the driving fast) and as a kind of last resort went to her doctor who recommended some medication. This totally rubbed my wife the wrong way because it implied there was something wrong with her out of her control... but eventually she decided to try it - and it's worked wonders.

The chemistry in peoples' brains change over time, and maybe it's causing an imbalance in you. Discussing it with a doctor may lead you down a path to correct that imbalance - try it, you might be surprised.

Good luck!

gota911

That is a good point.

I am not sure why people resist such treatment these days. If someone finds out they have high blood pressure, or is a diabetic, they take the medicine without hesitation. But if they have a chemical imbalance which can cause depression or mood swings, they hesitate or resist to take the medication. It is a shame that such a stigma has been so prevalent in our society, but I think it is improving. That is a good thing because there are a lot more depressed people in this world than most of us would ever guess.

Nicolaasdb

don't go the medication route..... I know someone close who did this and things get worse not better taking legal drugs! ....... I tried st johns worth pills over the counter herbal and it helped me...... but in the end you got to make the best out of life and it can be tough....I could get depressed at times, but everything changed when my first daughter was born almost 2 years ago. You can't be depressed with a little kid around you.
About the speeding part....I do it all the time and am 43 I did it when I was 18 and never really stopped.... I don't speed within city limits and I sometimes just put my tip into manual and keep the P in a low gear to hear the engine growl....I feel childish doing it...but it makes the child in me happy.
Remember recognizing you got a problem is the first step to solving the problem...... and this forum will always be around to pitch in and "help"

smackboy1

There's autocross and karting. Spend a few days at a driving school e.g. Skip Barber. 110 miles isn't so very far away for a track weekend if you have no wife/kids to deal with.

Phil G.

Tim is on point here, no question. There (unfortunately) is still stigma attached to even getting professional help, let alone going on medications for depression. Depression can be endogenous or situational, or a combination of both - you stated that members of your family are affected also, so it's not surprising you have a tendency to this also, and I'll bet this problem has been present for a while. The key is to talk to a professional. Medication may or may not be the way to go, but it may help you get through a particularly rough patch. Consider it.

Sounds like he has little family support, no kids etc. You'd be amazed at how many of my patients with beautiful young children are depressed as hell. OTC meds like St. Johns Wort can help some people, but in his case, I would consult a professional to talk this through before he even considers the medication route - either OTC or prescription. It's not a sign of weakness - on the contrary, it's a sign of strength. Recognizing you've got a problem and dealing with it head on. And I don't dismiss the idea of doing a DE or track event as therapy either.

granracing

Do you like kids? Just because your friends now have kids certainly doesn't mean you can't be a big part of their lives. Sure, some of your activities may change but it will still be fun. Instead of going Mt. biking with friends, we now hit rail trails with my son in a bike trailer. I have two friends who kinda sound like they'd be in the same position as you, but instead they are over my house all the time. (Single, have homes where they get bored / lonely, most friends moved away). One of them didn't seem like such a kid person, but I see him smiling now more than ever with my son. Both friends have built quite a bond with the little guy. Talk to your friends and communicate that you'd like to spend more time with them. Unless you dislike kids. lol

110 miles to the track? That's really not bad at all. Have you done any track days? That does sound like a great outlet for your speeding desires. Every time I really feel like pushing this too far, an internal voice tells me to not be stupid and save it for the track. I usually listen. I can't say I don't enjoy my entrance / exist ramps more than I should, but I'm a lot better than I would be if I didn't have that outlet. The other great thing is I guarantee you'll meet people you'll get along with and become friends.

Maybe you'll want to take a step further and get into wheel-to-wheel racing? I am absolutely addicted to it. One thing with this sport is it can be a bit time consuming which could be a good thing for you. Come to an SCCA race and see for yourself. I know it's not necessarily Porsche specific, but you could post something on the ImprovedTouring.com forum (SCCA related racing site) with something as simple as "want to look into racing, anyone from XX I could join for a race." I will admit I'm biased to this category / club.

Dave

RF5BPilot

If you really think some of what you're dealing with is long-term depression, then it's worth it to see a doctor, even just to make sure there isn't some underlying medical issue that is surfacing in an unusual way.

Jumping behind the wheel to blow off steam is a bit like playing with loaded guns when you get drunk. Want to drive fast? That's what track days, autocrosses, etc. are for. Injuring yourself is one thing, taking out a family or children because you blasted down a country road is something else. A younger brother-in-law of mine bought a Lotus and enjoyed back roads. Within 4 mos, he was dead & a friend seriously injured from sliding sideways into a tree. Never would go to track days or autocrosses to develop skills.

Just blowing off steam is probably better done with a good jog or run. Smash a tennis opponent?

chsu74

Drugs and Hookers.

I am 3 yrs older than you. On a serious note, you can find a new hobby where it can drain you of excess energy at the end of the day. Mountain biking would be a good option for you if you like the outdoors. I have been an avid tennis player for the past 25 years and its my first love after my wife of course..

4Scargo

Hey buddy-strange place to get advice, huh? Tim and Phil are right...took me along time to finally take anti depressants. Came home from the Dr's office many times with them and, after a week, threw them away. I didn't want to "lose" me, be too manic or numb. I've been on Lexapro for a year and it has changed my life. (for the good, by the way) Don't drink, period! If you do than you may be self medicating and alcohol is a depressant and it doesn't work. Take $2,000 and take some flying lessons and solo. Go up and do a Tandem jump. PM me if you want to talk....been there....and shut that door. It's all good.

eroy2

Well, my depression hit earlier and finding someone truly special to be in your life helped me out. GL with your journey towards finding out what you need in life. Its different for everyone so I'm not going to put my spin on it but I think talking to a professional is a good step in the right direction. I wish my brother would. Sad and depressed since he was 10. Not good decisions in life. But he'll survive. Just like you will.

As for your speeding problem, I just drive my miata and at 30 mph it sounds like I'm doing 100. Gets my aggressions out. And I go to the track which is thankfully very close. Sometimes it isn't possible but since you have the spare time I'd try the track once. You'll get hooked, believe me. After driving on the track I don't even try to speed much on the streets. I don't speed through neighborhoods just major roads.

My opinion only. Whatever you decide to do, for your sake I hope you listen to the well meaning advice that your peers in this forum have tried to give you.

medtech

As far as your driving is concerned, when I get behind the wheel, I find it helpful to ask myself, "What Would Jesus Do?", "How Would Jesus Drive?" If you drive like Jesus, you should never have any problems.

redridge

take some time off.... put a backpack on and travel the world. This is a great way to find yourself, loose the baggage and learn to deal with yourself... in the end you'll be just fine!

As for speeding, thats a tough one.

medtech

Ok, time for an intervention here.

Clearly you have hit rock bottom when you are asking for life advice on THIS forum. I mean do you know who you're talking to? Let me enlighten you...

Phil - May suffer from a little OCD. And currently his car has the WORST case of agoraphobia (fear of public places) I've ever seen. Poor thing lives it's entire life hiding in a garage. Quite sad really...

Ed - Well, have you ever watched animal planet, where the animal police go to the crazy cat lady's house, and she has like 50 cats? Well, that's Ed's house, except instead of the smell of cat pee, it's motor oil, and instead of cats, it's GT2 parts.

Manny - Has split personality disorder. Always telling the cops it's his "evil twin" that did it.

Tim - Currently the DSM IV lists Tim's condition as "unclassified"....I'll leave it at that.

Seriously though, if you have a family history of depression, then you need to see a professional. There's no shame in getting on some medications to Help stabilize you, if needed. There is no Magic pill, and ultimately you have to change your life to reflect the person you want to be. Hopefully this current introspection you are experiencing is just the beginning. At 31 it's good to sit down and realized that toys and running around being selfish may not be what life's all about. Run with that. Get some professional help, and then get into some positive action. Change your life for the better, one day at a time. Remember, baby steps.

Good luck,

A

Phil G.

I think Drew and Medtech need some group therapy. Or maybe just a group hug.