From ROGER With Love
11-08-2014, 12:55 AM
#1
Rennlist Member
Thread Starter
From ROGER With Love
Gentlemen,
At great personal risk to himself, secret agent Roger Tyson (not his real name) has again succeeded where all others have failed. The details of his latest mission are as follows:
After completing a blindfolded backwards midnight High Altitude Low Opening parachute approach, agent Tyson splashed down in the waters of the icy North Atlantic.
He swam silently for 17 miles through ice-shark infested waters to reach the secret hidden underground lair of the highly evil Doctor Dredding D. Karfixx (see prior files).
Tyson scaled the sheer rock face of a rock-cobra infested cliff to gain entry into the cave leading to the unseen fortress of terror and despair! Fending off several horribly scary attacks from very loyal and intelligent trained imported vampire bats with jet-packs, he silently reached the solid steel door to the lair with 3 different combination locks on it. Picking the locks and sneaking inside by crouching down real low, agent Roger found himself squaring off against a 9 foot tall genetically enhanced female ninja-ballerina practiced in the shadowy esoteric art of Ballerininjutsu! He vanquished the very large and very dangerous assasinette in a mind-bending bout of hand-to-ballerina combat and suddenly came face-to-face with Doctor Dredding D. Karfixx himself!
The two arch-enemies stared at each other very seriously. Then, they sat down in a couple of really nice leather chairs and looked at some different types of killer crabs and killer fish in a huge fish tank. After a few snacks, the unspeakably evil Doctor Karfixx challenged agent Tyson to a round of Chwisster (an ancient oriental game based on chess and "Twister"). A duel to the death! Tyson deftly checkmated Karfixx in the spleen with the ancient inverted-claw-hammer blow (taught only in Tibet in odd-numbered years) and grabbed the prize he had sought, the world's only pair of perfect replacement fuel lines for a 1981 928S Euro !!! As Doctor Karfixx moaned on the Chwisster board in a crumpled and mangled pile of evil, agent Tyson laughed and quickly dashed down a circular staircase into the well-lit (and heated) garage of the underground lair! He hotwired Doctor Karfixx's personal Saab 900 Turbo (sunroof, a/c works) and sped away to a Ramada Inn to await exfiltration courtesy of the local secret agent assistants -- comprised of good female ballerinas disguised as ninjas in white ninja uniforms -- who all happened to be BEAUTIFUL.
Bruised but happy, agent Tyson return to his home base, promptly sold the fuel lines to me at a great price, and I will be installing them tomorrow.
The fuel lines in question, as you know, are made from an alloy of Kryptonite and Unobtanium, and coated in a self-sealing living membrane
called 'Perfectoplasm' which is self-aware
and independently capable of repairing other nearby engine parts. Over 9 foreign governments have tried but failed to get their evil foreign hands on these fuel lines. Too late!!!!!
Thank you again, Agent Tyson!
The free world can breathe easier tonight knowing that these fuel lines are back working for good instead of evil !
At great personal risk to himself, secret agent Roger Tyson (not his real name) has again succeeded where all others have failed. The details of his latest mission are as follows:
After completing a blindfolded backwards midnight High Altitude Low Opening parachute approach, agent Tyson splashed down in the waters of the icy North Atlantic.
He swam silently for 17 miles through ice-shark infested waters to reach the secret hidden underground lair of the highly evil Doctor Dredding D. Karfixx (see prior files).
Tyson scaled the sheer rock face of a rock-cobra infested cliff to gain entry into the cave leading to the unseen fortress of terror and despair! Fending off several horribly scary attacks from very loyal and intelligent trained imported vampire bats with jet-packs, he silently reached the solid steel door to the lair with 3 different combination locks on it. Picking the locks and sneaking inside by crouching down real low, agent Roger found himself squaring off against a 9 foot tall genetically enhanced female ninja-ballerina practiced in the shadowy esoteric art of Ballerininjutsu! He vanquished the very large and very dangerous assasinette in a mind-bending bout of hand-to-ballerina combat and suddenly came face-to-face with Doctor Dredding D. Karfixx himself!
The two arch-enemies stared at each other very seriously. Then, they sat down in a couple of really nice leather chairs and looked at some different types of killer crabs and killer fish in a huge fish tank. After a few snacks, the unspeakably evil Doctor Karfixx challenged agent Tyson to a round of Chwisster (an ancient oriental game based on chess and "Twister"). A duel to the death! Tyson deftly checkmated Karfixx in the spleen with the ancient inverted-claw-hammer blow (taught only in Tibet in odd-numbered years) and grabbed the prize he had sought, the world's only pair of perfect replacement fuel lines for a 1981 928S Euro !!! As Doctor Karfixx moaned on the Chwisster board in a crumpled and mangled pile of evil, agent Tyson laughed and quickly dashed down a circular staircase into the well-lit (and heated) garage of the underground lair! He hotwired Doctor Karfixx's personal Saab 900 Turbo (sunroof, a/c works) and sped away to a Ramada Inn to await exfiltration courtesy of the local secret agent assistants -- comprised of good female ballerinas disguised as ninjas in white ninja uniforms -- who all happened to be BEAUTIFUL.
Bruised but happy, agent Tyson return to his home base, promptly sold the fuel lines to me at a great price, and I will be installing them tomorrow.
The fuel lines in question, as you know, are made from an alloy of Kryptonite and Unobtanium, and coated in a self-sealing living membrane
called 'Perfectoplasm' which is self-aware
and independently capable of repairing other nearby engine parts. Over 9 foreign governments have tried but failed to get their evil foreign hands on these fuel lines. Too late!!!!!
Thank you again, Agent Tyson!
The free world can breathe easier tonight knowing that these fuel lines are back working for good instead of evil !
11-08-2014, 01:42 AM
#4
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11-08-2014, 05:46 AM
#5
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Gentlemen,
At great personal risk to himself, secret agent Roger Tyson (not his real name) has again succeeded where all others have failed. The details of his latest mission are as follows:
After completing a blindfolded backwards midnight High Altitude Low Opening parachute approach, agent Tyson splashed down in the waters of the icy North Atlantic.
He swam silently for 17 miles through ice-shark infested waters to reach the secret hidden underground lair of the highly evil Doctor Dredding D. Karfixx (see prior files).
Tyson scaled the sheer rock face of a rock-cobra infested cliff to gain entry into the cave leading to the unseen fortress of terror and despair! Fending off several horribly scary attacks from very loyal and intelligent trained imported vampire bats with jet-packs, he silently reached the solid steel door to the lair with 3 different combination locks on it. Picking the locks and sneaking inside by crouching down real low, agent Roger found himself squaring off against a 9 foot tall genetically enhanced female ninja-ballerina practiced in the shadowy esoteric art of Ballerininjutsu! He vanquished the very large and very dangerous assasinette in a mind-bending bout of hand-to-ballerina combat and suddenly came face-to-face with Doctor Dredding D. Karfixx himself!
The two arch-enemies stared at each other very seriously. Then, they sat down in a couple of really nice leather chairs and looked at some different types of killer crabs and killer fish in a huge fish tank. After a few snacks, the unspeakably evil Doctor Karfixx challenged agent Tyson to a round of Chwisster (an ancient oriental game based on chess and "Twister"). A duel to the death! Tyson deftly checkmated Karfixx in the spleen with the ancient inverted-claw-hammer blow (taught only in Tibet in odd-numbered years) and grabbed the prize he had sought, the world's only pair of perfect replacement fuel lines for a 1981 928S Euro !!! As Doctor Karfixx moaned on the Chwisster board in a crumpled and mangled pile of evil, agent Tyson laughed and quickly dashed down a circular staircase into the well-lit (and heated) garage of the underground lair! He hotwired Doctor Karfixx's personal Saab 900 Turbo (sunroof, a/c works) and sped away to a Ramada Inn to await exfiltration courtesy of the local secret agent assistants -- comprised of good female ballerinas disguised as ninjas in white ninja uniforms -- who all happened to be BEAUTIFUL.
Bruised but happy, agent Tyson return to his home base, promptly sold the fuel lines to me at a great price, and I will be installing them tomorrow.
The fuel lines in question, as you know, are made from an alloy of Kryptonite and Unobtanium, and coated in a self-sealing living membrane
called 'Perfectoplasm' which is self-aware
and independently capable of repairing other nearby engine parts. Over 9 foreign governments have tried but failed to get their evil foreign hands on these fuel lines. Too late!!!!!
Thank you again, Agent Tyson!
The free world can breathe easier tonight knowing that these fuel lines are back working for good instead of evil !
At great personal risk to himself, secret agent Roger Tyson (not his real name) has again succeeded where all others have failed. The details of his latest mission are as follows:
After completing a blindfolded backwards midnight High Altitude Low Opening parachute approach, agent Tyson splashed down in the waters of the icy North Atlantic.
He swam silently for 17 miles through ice-shark infested waters to reach the secret hidden underground lair of the highly evil Doctor Dredding D. Karfixx (see prior files).
Tyson scaled the sheer rock face of a rock-cobra infested cliff to gain entry into the cave leading to the unseen fortress of terror and despair! Fending off several horribly scary attacks from very loyal and intelligent trained imported vampire bats with jet-packs, he silently reached the solid steel door to the lair with 3 different combination locks on it. Picking the locks and sneaking inside by crouching down real low, agent Roger found himself squaring off against a 9 foot tall genetically enhanced female ninja-ballerina practiced in the shadowy esoteric art of Ballerininjutsu! He vanquished the very large and very dangerous assasinette in a mind-bending bout of hand-to-ballerina combat and suddenly came face-to-face with Doctor Dredding D. Karfixx himself!
The two arch-enemies stared at each other very seriously. Then, they sat down in a couple of really nice leather chairs and looked at some different types of killer crabs and killer fish in a huge fish tank. After a few snacks, the unspeakably evil Doctor Karfixx challenged agent Tyson to a round of Chwisster (an ancient oriental game based on chess and "Twister"). A duel to the death! Tyson deftly checkmated Karfixx in the spleen with the ancient inverted-claw-hammer blow (taught only in Tibet in odd-numbered years) and grabbed the prize he had sought, the world's only pair of perfect replacement fuel lines for a 1981 928S Euro !!! As Doctor Karfixx moaned on the Chwisster board in a crumpled and mangled pile of evil, agent Tyson laughed and quickly dashed down a circular staircase into the well-lit (and heated) garage of the underground lair! He hotwired Doctor Karfixx's personal Saab 900 Turbo (sunroof, a/c works) and sped away to a Ramada Inn to await exfiltration courtesy of the local secret agent assistants -- comprised of good female ballerinas disguised as ninjas in white ninja uniforms -- who all happened to be BEAUTIFUL.
Bruised but happy, agent Tyson return to his home base, promptly sold the fuel lines to me at a great price, and I will be installing them tomorrow.
The fuel lines in question, as you know, are made from an alloy of Kryptonite and Unobtanium, and coated in a self-sealing living membrane
called 'Perfectoplasm' which is self-aware
and independently capable of repairing other nearby engine parts. Over 9 foreign governments have tried but failed to get their evil foreign hands on these fuel lines. Too late!!!!!
Thank you again, Agent Tyson!
The free world can breathe easier tonight knowing that these fuel lines are back working for good instead of evil !
Arrrrrrrrrrrrr harrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr haarrrrrrrrrrrrrr koff choke splutter
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11-08-2014, 09:23 AM
#9
Rennlist Member
Great stuff; one of the better "props" posts I've seen!
11-08-2014, 10:00 AM
#10
I just read the first section of the story to the crowd here at 3rd coast at the drivers meeting. Everyone laughed.
Funny stuff, thanks for the laugh.
Funny stuff, thanks for the laugh.
11-08-2014, 10:39 AM
#11
Three Wheelin'
11-08-2014, 03:57 PM
#15
Rennlist Member
Thread Starter
Yes sir, that is my understanding regarding the outer silver coating.
Of course I am just having some good-natured fun with my crazy story.
I am so glad to have these replacement parts available,
as well as the advice and expertise of the vendors and members here.
It actually is an enormous contrast to the "way it used to be" when trying to work on a car myself years (and years and years) ago,
in that the level of knowledge and willing assistance is so readily available here,
and is so accurate.
It used to be a Bentley's or Haynes' or (heaven forbid) a Chilton's and I was in the dark otherwise.
I truly started my pursuit of a 928 by lurking here for 2 years,
then finding a great car here on Rennlist for sale,
and moving forward carefully, usually in small steps.
Thanks to all of you guys, really, thanks.
Dan
Of course I am just having some good-natured fun with my crazy story.
I am so glad to have these replacement parts available,
as well as the advice and expertise of the vendors and members here.
It actually is an enormous contrast to the "way it used to be" when trying to work on a car myself years (and years and years) ago,
in that the level of knowledge and willing assistance is so readily available here,
and is so accurate.
It used to be a Bentley's or Haynes' or (heaven forbid) a Chilton's and I was in the dark otherwise.
I truly started my pursuit of a 928 by lurking here for 2 years,
then finding a great car here on Rennlist for sale,
and moving forward carefully, usually in small steps.
Thanks to all of you guys, really, thanks.
Dan