i did my first clutch job over about 2 days of on and off work. got it done, drove around the block, and the battery started to die on me. turned out i forgot to attach the ground to the top of the bell housing, reached down there with the bolt to bolt it down.... bolt fell int he clutch inspection hole....

so then after a SECOND clutch job... the car was ready to go again...

i am still the only member of the "holy ****, did i really just do that" face club.... but this man club sounds cool too.

 

I'd only consider those Borg implants if they gave me at least 500 HP to the wheels.

 

You think you had it rough? One time, I had to change out the clutch while there Bigfoot and Manbearpig fought on my crotch, simultaneously having to disassemble an atomic bomb without any tools WITH MY FEET and having to build a new clutch because the original just disappeared in a space-time continuum worm hole. I had to build it out of gravel and sticks. And then, this guy jumps down right, and he's like "I KNOW KUNG FU!" and we started fighting. I impaled him on a stick though, then shoved my fist down his throat before he lost breath, grabbed his intenstines, ripped them out, wraped them around his throat, and choked him. He ended up dying of typhoid fever.

Anywho, whole job took me about 2 hours tops...

 

:: bows down before the master ::

 

Recognize!

 

:: gives props ::

 

Chuck norris doesn't have to do clutch jobs, the car is too afraid to blow its clutch out instead!

 

rofl.

One of my stories is like bloodravens...except, back in my day we didn't have gravel and sticks. To have a new clutch, I had to use the kung-fu guy's (along with his second cousins') intestines that I previously ripped out, compress them with Chuck Norris' buttcheeks, and melt them into place on the old disc with heat produced by the decaying plutonium in the atomic bomb. However, since the bomb had been deactivated, I had to start the thermal reaction by drinking hot engine oil to elevate my body temperature and urinate on the radioactive element.

 

i just put a clutch delete on my car and everything worked a-okay.