Joke of the Day Holiday Edition
#18
My brother just sent this to me...
It s Christmas Eve and Santa arrives at this beautiful young woman s apartment. She takes one look at Santa and decides that she needs to make love to Santa.
She say s “Oh Santa, won't you stay the night? Santa replies, “HO, HO, HO, Gotta go! Gotta Go! Gotta deliver those toys, you know.
The young woman tries to tempt Santa again by letting down her long silky hair and begs, “Oh Santa, now won't you stay? Santa again replies, “HO, HO, HO, Gotta go! Gotta Go! Gotta deliver those toys, you know.
The young woman tries one last time. This time she opens her house robe and reveals her beautiful body. She then asks, “Oh Santa, won't you please stay. Santa, now becoming aroused, replies, “Hey, Hey, Hey, Gotta Stay! Gotta Stay! Won't fit up the chimney THIS way!
She say s “Oh Santa, won't you stay the night? Santa replies, “HO, HO, HO, Gotta go! Gotta Go! Gotta deliver those toys, you know.
The young woman tries to tempt Santa again by letting down her long silky hair and begs, “Oh Santa, now won't you stay? Santa again replies, “HO, HO, HO, Gotta go! Gotta Go! Gotta deliver those toys, you know.
The young woman tries one last time. This time she opens her house robe and reveals her beautiful body. She then asks, “Oh Santa, won't you please stay. Santa, now becoming aroused, replies, “Hey, Hey, Hey, Gotta Stay! Gotta Stay! Won't fit up the chimney THIS way!
#19
A husband and wife are shopping in their local Wal-Mart.
The husband picks up a case of Budweiser and puts it in
their cart.
'What do you think you're doing?' asks the wife.
'They're on sale, only $10 for 24 cans,' he replies.
'Put them back, we can't afford them,' demands
the wife, and so they carry on shopping.
A few aisles further on along the woman picks up a $20
jar of face cream and puts it in the basket.
'What do you think you're doing?' asks the husband.
'Its my face cream. It makes me look beautiful,' replies
the wife.
Her husband retorts: 'So does 24 cans of Budweiser
and its half the price.'
On the PA system: 'Cleanup needed on aisle 25, we have a
husband down'
The husband picks up a case of Budweiser and puts it in
their cart.
'What do you think you're doing?' asks the wife.
'They're on sale, only $10 for 24 cans,' he replies.
'Put them back, we can't afford them,' demands
the wife, and so they carry on shopping.
A few aisles further on along the woman picks up a $20
jar of face cream and puts it in the basket.
'What do you think you're doing?' asks the husband.
'Its my face cream. It makes me look beautiful,' replies
the wife.
Her husband retorts: 'So does 24 cans of Budweiser
and its half the price.'
On the PA system: 'Cleanup needed on aisle 25, we have a
husband down'