Bonnie, please show these to your betrothed
#1
Lifetime Rennlist
Member
Thread Starter
Bonnie, please show these to your betrothed
Marriage,
You have two choices in life:
1. You can stay single and be miserable
2.Get married and wish you were dead.
* * * * *
At a cocktail party, one woman said to another, 'Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?'
'Yes, I am. I married the wrong man.'
* * * * *
A lady inserted an ad in the classified:
'Husband Wanted'.
Next day she received a hundred letters.
They all said the same thing:
'You can have mine.'
* * * * *
When a woman steals your husband, there is no better revenge than to let her keep him.
* * * * *
A little boy asked his father,
'Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?'
Father replied, 'I don't know son, I'm still paying..'
* * * * *
A young son asked,
'Is it true Dad, that in some parts of Africa a man doesn't know his wife until he marries her?'
Dad replied, 'That happens in every country, son.'
* * * * *
Then there was a woman who said, 'I never knew what real happiness was until I got married, and by then, it was too late.'
* * * * *
Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. If you want your spouse to listen and pay strict attention to every word you say, talk in your sleep.
* * * * *
Just think, if it weren't for marriage, men would go through life thinking they had no faults at all.
* * * * *
First guy says, 'My wife's an angel!'
Second guy remarks, 'You're lucky, mine's still alive.'
* * * * *
'A Woman's Prayer:
Dear Lord,
I pray for: Wisdom, to understand a man , Love to forgive him and for Patience for his moods.
Because Lord, if I pray for Strength I'll just beat him to death!'
You have two choices in life:
1. You can stay single and be miserable
2.Get married and wish you were dead.
* * * * *
At a cocktail party, one woman said to another, 'Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?'
'Yes, I am. I married the wrong man.'
* * * * *
A lady inserted an ad in the classified:
'Husband Wanted'.
Next day she received a hundred letters.
They all said the same thing:
'You can have mine.'
* * * * *
When a woman steals your husband, there is no better revenge than to let her keep him.
* * * * *
A little boy asked his father,
'Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?'
Father replied, 'I don't know son, I'm still paying..'
* * * * *
A young son asked,
'Is it true Dad, that in some parts of Africa a man doesn't know his wife until he marries her?'
Dad replied, 'That happens in every country, son.'
* * * * *
Then there was a woman who said, 'I never knew what real happiness was until I got married, and by then, it was too late.'
* * * * *
Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. If you want your spouse to listen and pay strict attention to every word you say, talk in your sleep.
* * * * *
Just think, if it weren't for marriage, men would go through life thinking they had no faults at all.
* * * * *
First guy says, 'My wife's an angel!'
Second guy remarks, 'You're lucky, mine's still alive.'
* * * * *
'A Woman's Prayer:
Dear Lord,
I pray for: Wisdom, to understand a man , Love to forgive him and for Patience for his moods.
Because Lord, if I pray for Strength I'll just beat him to death!'
#2
Moderator and 993 whisperer
Lifetime Rennlist
Member
Lifetime Rennlist
Member
Lol, those are cute, Mike. He's probably heard them already, but I'll show him when he gets home tonight.