Mike in Chi

Marriage,

You have two choices in life:
1. You can stay single and be miserable
2.Get married and wish you were dead.

* * * * *

At a cocktail party, one woman said to another, 'Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?'

'Yes, I am. I married the wrong man.'

* * * * *

A lady inserted an ad in the classified:

'Husband Wanted'.

Next day she received a hundred letters.

They all said the same thing:

'You can have mine.'

* * * * *

When a woman steals your husband, there is no better revenge than to let her keep him.

* * * * *

A little boy asked his father,
'Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?'
Father replied, 'I don't know son, I'm still paying..'

* * * * *

A young son asked,
'Is it true Dad, that in some parts of Africa a man doesn't know his wife until he marries her?'
Dad replied, 'That happens in every country, son.'

* * * * *

Then there was a woman who said, 'I never knew what real happiness was until I got married, and by then, it was too late.'

* * * * *

Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. If you want your spouse to listen and pay strict attention to every word you say, talk in your sleep.

* * * * *

Just think, if it weren't for marriage, men would go through life thinking they had no faults at all.

* * * * *

First guy says, 'My wife's an angel!'

Second guy remarks, 'You're lucky, mine's still alive.'

* * * * *

'A Woman's Prayer:

Dear Lord,
I pray for: Wisdom, to understand a man , Love to forgive him and for Patience for his moods.

Because Lord, if I pray for Strength I'll just beat him to death!'

Bonster

Lol, those are cute, Mike. He's probably heard them already, but I'll show him when he gets home tonight.