Bad joke of the day
11-01-2007, 12:14 PM
#1
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Bad joke of the day
A man kills a deer and takes it home to cook for dinner.
Both he and his wife decide that they won't tell the kids what kind of meat it is, but will give them a clue and let them guess.
The kids were eager to know what the meat was on their plates, so they begged their dad for the clue.
Well, he said, 'It's what mommy calls me sometimes'.
The little girl screams to her brother 'Don't eat it, it's an a-hole.
Both he and his wife decide that they won't tell the kids what kind of meat it is, but will give them a clue and let them guess.
The kids were eager to know what the meat was on their plates, so they begged their dad for the clue.
Well, he said, 'It's what mommy calls me sometimes'.
The little girl screams to her brother 'Don't eat it, it's an a-hole.
11-01-2007, 11:52 PM
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Oh, I thought this was the bad joke of the day. VR as a Home Improvement Host
http://www.metacafe.com/watch/50115/home_garden_tv/
http://www.metacafe.com/watch/50115/home_garden_tv/
11-02-2007, 09:53 AM
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Oh, I thought this was the bad joke of the day. VR as a Home Improvement Host
http://www.metacafe.com/watch/50115/home_garden_tv/
http://www.metacafe.com/watch/50115/home_garden_tv/
11-02-2007, 10:07 AM
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LMFAO...
11-02-2007, 10:15 AM
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Yeah, 'cause I would never wear a cockbroom moustache like that anyway...
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12-02-2007, 03:18 PM
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Okay, I figured this should go with this thread.
While walking through Golden Gate Park in San Francisco, a man came upon another man hugging a tree with his ear firmly against the tree. Seeing this he inquired, "Just out of curiosity, what the heck are you doing?"
"I'm listening to the music of the tree," the other man replied.
"You've gotta be kiddin' me."
"No, would you like to give it a try?"
Understandably curious, the man says, "Well, OK..." So he wrapped his arms around the tree and pressed his ear up against it. With this, the other guy slapped a pair of handcuffs on him, took his wallet, jewelry, car keys, then stripped him naked and left.
Two hours later another nature lover strolled by, saw this guy handcuffed to the tree stark naked, and asked, "What the heck happened to you?"
He told the guy the whole terrible story about how he got there.
When he finished telling his story, the other guy shook his head in sympathy, walked around behind him, kissed him gently behind the ear and said, "This just ain't gonna be your day, cupcake..."
While walking through Golden Gate Park in San Francisco, a man came upon another man hugging a tree with his ear firmly against the tree. Seeing this he inquired, "Just out of curiosity, what the heck are you doing?"
"I'm listening to the music of the tree," the other man replied.
"You've gotta be kiddin' me."
"No, would you like to give it a try?"
Understandably curious, the man says, "Well, OK..." So he wrapped his arms around the tree and pressed his ear up against it. With this, the other guy slapped a pair of handcuffs on him, took his wallet, jewelry, car keys, then stripped him naked and left.
Two hours later another nature lover strolled by, saw this guy handcuffed to the tree stark naked, and asked, "What the heck happened to you?"
He told the guy the whole terrible story about how he got there.
When he finished telling his story, the other guy shook his head in sympathy, walked around behind him, kissed him gently behind the ear and said, "This just ain't gonna be your day, cupcake..."
12-02-2007, 08:16 PM
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How bout another one? That painful reality had me laughing not to cry. 
I was sitting in the waiting room for my first appointment with a dentist I had not been to as a patient before. I noticed his DDS diploma, which bore his full name. Suddenly, I remembered that a tall, handsome, bark haired boy with the same name had been in my high school class about 39 years ago. Could he be the same guy that I had had a secrete crush on way back then?
Upon seeing him, however, I quickly discarded any such thought. This balding, gray haired man with the deeply lined face was way too old to have been my classmate.
After he examined my teeth, I asked him if he had attended Spring Branch High School. “Yes. Yes, I did. I’m a Spring Branch Bear!” He gleamed with pride.
“When did you graduate?” I asked.
He answered, “In 1966. Why do you ask?”
“Well you were in my class!” I exclaimed.
He looked at me closely. Then, that ugly, old, wrinkled son of a bitch asked, “What did you teach?”
I was sitting in the waiting room for my first appointment with a dentist I had not been to as a patient before. I noticed his DDS diploma, which bore his full name. Suddenly, I remembered that a tall, handsome, bark haired boy with the same name had been in my high school class about 39 years ago. Could he be the same guy that I had had a secrete crush on way back then?
Upon seeing him, however, I quickly discarded any such thought. This balding, gray haired man with the deeply lined face was way too old to have been my classmate.
After he examined my teeth, I asked him if he had attended Spring Branch High School. “Yes. Yes, I did. I’m a Spring Branch Bear!” He gleamed with pride.
“When did you graduate?” I asked.
He answered, “In 1966. Why do you ask?”
“Well you were in my class!” I exclaimed.
He looked at me closely. Then, that ugly, old, wrinkled son of a bitch asked, “What did you teach?”
12-02-2007, 11:19 PM
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12-03-2007, 07:15 AM
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12-03-2007, 09:32 AM
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