What is the stupidest thing you ever did to/with your 997?
12-21-2005, 09:26 AM
#1
Burning Brakes
Thread Starter
What is the stupidest thing you ever did to/with your 997?
Hey its winter here. And its coffee drinking time before I start the work day. Why not start a thread knowing that whatever you did, there is a fellow Board member that probably out beat you?
For me, its simple: On my second glass of wine, playing with my new toy in the garage only 24 hours after taking delivery, I sat in the eletric powered drivers seat and reclined the seat back into the wind stop, proceeding to crack the windstop and forever scuff the leather when the wind stop peg flung out of the hole into the leather side panel.
(got the windstop replaced under warranty - but the scuff will serve as the pleasant memory for the life of the car)
Come on... what can the rest of us learn from your mistakes? Come clean!!
For me, its simple: On my second glass of wine, playing with my new toy in the garage only 24 hours after taking delivery, I sat in the eletric powered drivers seat and reclined the seat back into the wind stop, proceeding to crack the windstop and forever scuff the leather when the wind stop peg flung out of the hole into the leather side panel.
(got the windstop replaced under warranty - but the scuff will serve as the pleasant memory for the life of the car) Come on... what can the rest of us learn from your mistakes? Come clean!!
12-21-2005, 01:28 PM
#2
Burning Brakes
Raised the windshield wipers off the window glass while detailing the car. Then I opened the hood, which caused the wipers to hit the rear edge of the hood and smack down onto the window with a loud "thwack." I don't think that my paint was scratched or anything, but gosh, did I feel stupid.
12-21-2005, 01:46 PM
#3
Burning Brakes
Thread Starter
In the absence of my personal friend who is not a member of this Board, a certain physician who leases his p-car, I will post as his agent: "I was washing my car and just finished quick detailing my ride, when I went into the house while the keys were still in the ignition to get a drink. When I returned, the car was gone! It was stolen! No wait, it was not stolen... upon closer inspection, it rolled away backwards, onto the rear lawn, down the hill, and hit a tree. It turns out the parking brake was not engaged. The rear bumber needed to be replaced."
Everyone in our group of friends, except me, laughed at that one. I was deeply saddened. He may get the award for that one! At least it crashed looking nice and clean!
Everyone in our group of friends, except me, laughed at that one. I was deeply saddened. He may get the award for that one! At least it crashed looking nice and clean!
12-21-2005, 02:50 PM
#5
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I love the all time classic: a guy put his hot coffee on his 911 roof, fumbled with keys, got in car, forgot coffee, opened roof. Made me cry when I read his first hand account a few years ago.
12-21-2005, 02:52 PM
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Park the M3 and 997 next to eachother. Had to get something out of the M3; open passenger door, TELL MYSELF OVER AND OVER DO NOT DING PORSCHE DO NOT DING PORSCHE! Guess what: I dinged Porsche. F***!
12-21-2005, 03:20 PM
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It wasn't a Porsche, but since I'm still waiting I thought I'd share this story.
It was during high school, I was probably 17, my parents were out of town for an extended medical issue and I was on my own. I had bought my own car when I turned 16 and I was pretty proud it was a late model Toyota Celica GT.
Well, I was goofing around on a low traffic road near my house and while trying to do a donut managed to get my car into a ditch. Knowing there would be no way of explaining how I ditched my car, less than a mile from the house on a straight road to my father, I decided to be self-sufficient.
I ran to the house, got my dad's truck and figured I'd pull the car out myself. I turned the wheels of the car, set the chain, and started to pull away in the truck. Just about the time I got the car moving out of the ditch several things happened at once. A) I remembered Newton's law of gravity and that I was pulling a car down hill.
B) A car (which one hadn't passed in the last hour) started coming in the opposite direction. 
C) I couldn't remember how far I had actually turned the wheels of the Celica.
So my mind is racing and I'm not sure what to do. If I stop the truck I'd rear-end myself (literally). If I don't stop the truck my car could swerve into the other lane and hit the on-coming car. As luck would have it the on-coming car was paying attention and saw that something was going on and slowed down, coming to a complete stop.
Lucky thing too, as I had turned the wheels on the Celica so much that it did swerve out into the oncoming lane and came to an immediate stop when the slack chain jerked it taught, pretty much in parralel with the truck.
So my heart it pounding and I'm trying to act like 'that worked just according to plan'. I hop out, give a friendly wave to the other driver, who looks just kind of confused at how this came to be, unhook my car, drive it to the shoulder and end up getting both cars home unscathed. It seems the chain had caught on the tires and didn't even scratch the undercarriage of the Celica.
A few years later I told my Dad that one when he was in the hospital. He had a good laugh and I learned first hand why you don't tow a car by yourself.
It was during high school, I was probably 17, my parents were out of town for an extended medical issue and I was on my own. I had bought my own car when I turned 16 and I was pretty proud it was a late model Toyota Celica GT.
Well, I was goofing around on a low traffic road near my house and while trying to do a donut managed to get my car into a ditch. Knowing there would be no way of explaining how I ditched my car, less than a mile from the house on a straight road to my father, I decided to be self-sufficient.
I ran to the house, got my dad's truck and figured I'd pull the car out myself. I turned the wheels of the car, set the chain, and started to pull away in the truck. Just about the time I got the car moving out of the ditch several things happened at once. A) I remembered Newton's law of gravity and that I was pulling a car down hill.
B) A car (which one hadn't passed in the last hour) started coming in the opposite direction. C) I couldn't remember how far I had actually turned the wheels of the Celica. So my mind is racing and I'm not sure what to do. If I stop the truck I'd rear-end myself (literally). If I don't stop the truck my car could swerve into the other lane and hit the on-coming car. As luck would have it the on-coming car was paying attention and saw that something was going on and slowed down, coming to a complete stop.
Lucky thing too, as I had turned the wheels on the Celica so much that it did swerve out into the oncoming lane and came to an immediate stop when the slack chain jerked it taught, pretty much in parralel with the truck.
So my heart it pounding and I'm trying to act like 'that worked just according to plan'. I hop out, give a friendly wave to the other driver, who looks just kind of confused at how this came to be, unhook my car, drive it to the shoulder and end up getting both cars home unscathed. It seems the chain had caught on the tires and didn't even scratch the undercarriage of the Celica.
A few years later I told my Dad that one when he was in the hospital. He had a good laugh and I learned first hand why you don't tow a car by yourself.
Last edited by canick; 12-21-2005 at 03:44 PM.
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12-21-2005, 04:25 PM
#9
Burning Brakes
Thread Starter
That was a very funny story. Since we are moving off of p-cars, I will tell you the all time stupidest thing I ever did involving cars.
Back in college, freshman year, I worked at a huge discount electronics store in Queens, New York. This store sold car stereos, among other things. We are talking about the days when the car stereos had cassette players built into the DIN shaped box, and you simply pulled out the stock unit, and inserted the after-market unit. Fairly simple.
So this 40-ish year old big guy walks in and I set him up with a new aftermarket unit, and 4 new speakers. The rear speakers were flush mount speakers. He asks me if I know a good reputable shop to install all this new gear, and in my infinite-know-it-all-wisdom at the time, I told him I would install it for $100 on the following Saturday at his house. After all - I am in college and that is lots of beer money.
He has a BRAND NEW Ford Bronco - his pride and joy. He loved that truck like our p-cars (he was telling me all about it as I was creating the sale of goods). I arrive at his house that Saturday and start working. I get the head unit in and powered up. I get the front door speakers swapped out. Now its time for the rear speakers. I pull out the tiny 5" speaker from the driver rear side of the truck. Now, there is an existing hole from the stock speaker. But the hole needs to be expanded to 10" to fit the new speaker. How does one cut this hole in the stock sheet metal (it was sheet metal!!)?? Using my specialty flat blade screw driver and hammer ( ), I create a template with a felt pen and start bashing holes in the metal with the flat blade of the screwdriver and the hammer - 5 millimeters at a time - until I get the complete circle.
So its done, right? I pry off the scrap sheet metal and what do I find? A frucking STEEL BEAM!!!!!!
There is a STEEL BEAM running down from the roof such that the flush mount speaker will not EVER fit in that hole!!! Let me tell you - there are very few times in my life that I ever had an "O-SH@T" and that was a big one. I said to myself immediately at that time that I was a college kid and I will look back at this and laugh. What was he going to do - kill me? (it did cross my mind!!) But I had to tell the dude what happened. 
SO, I come clean. I show him. He very calmly says "so what do we do?" and I said I would sell him an even BETTER pair of rear SURFACE mount speakers at no charge and mount the same OVER the hole. I tell him it will sound better since those speakers have their own enclosure. He goes for it!!! I run to the store and swap the speakers. When the job was done, the hole was covered, the system worked, I got paid, and I NEVER installed another stereo in someone elses car ever again.
LOL. It's been a long time since I told that story.
Back in college, freshman year, I worked at a huge discount electronics store in Queens, New York. This store sold car stereos, among other things. We are talking about the days when the car stereos had cassette players built into the DIN shaped box, and you simply pulled out the stock unit, and inserted the after-market unit. Fairly simple.
So this 40-ish year old big guy walks in and I set him up with a new aftermarket unit, and 4 new speakers. The rear speakers were flush mount speakers. He asks me if I know a good reputable shop to install all this new gear, and in my infinite-know-it-all-wisdom at the time, I told him I would install it for $100 on the following Saturday at his house. After all - I am in college and that is lots of beer money.
He has a BRAND NEW Ford Bronco - his pride and joy. He loved that truck like our p-cars (he was telling me all about it as I was creating the sale of goods). I arrive at his house that Saturday and start working. I get the head unit in and powered up. I get the front door speakers swapped out. Now its time for the rear speakers. I pull out the tiny 5" speaker from the driver rear side of the truck. Now, there is an existing hole from the stock speaker. But the hole needs to be expanded to 10" to fit the new speaker. How does one cut this hole in the stock sheet metal (it was sheet metal!!)?? Using my specialty flat blade screw driver and hammer (
), I create a template with a felt pen and start bashing holes in the metal with the flat blade of the screwdriver and the hammer - 5 millimeters at a time - until I get the complete circle.So its done, right? I pry off the scrap sheet metal and what do I find? A frucking STEEL BEAM!!!!!!
There is a STEEL BEAM running down from the roof such that the flush mount speaker will not EVER fit in that hole!!! Let me tell you - there are very few times in my life that I ever had an "O-SH@T" and that was a big one. I said to myself immediately at that time that I was a college kid and I will look back at this and laugh. What was he going to do - kill me? (it did cross my mind!!) But I had to tell the dude what happened. SO, I come clean. I show him. He very calmly says "so what do we do?" and I said I would sell him an even BETTER pair of rear SURFACE mount speakers at no charge and mount the same OVER the hole. I tell him it will sound better since those speakers have their own enclosure. He goes for it!!! I run to the store and swap the speakers. When the job was done, the hole was covered, the system worked, I got paid, and I NEVER installed another stereo in someone elses car ever again.
LOL. It's been a long time since I told that story.
12-21-2005, 05:38 PM
#12
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Had mine parked under my sister's carport while I was getting a new garage door installed at my home. I was drying the car after washing it and my sister come walking past. Leaning against one of the supports of the carport was about 5-6 metal star pegs ( about 5 foot long) I said to her " I reckon we should move them who knows if any of the boys might run past and knock them onto the Porsche"
Well she proceeded to sort of bear hug them to carry them away and guess what? Yep one got away and bang straight down onto the hood...Suffice to say we both had our moments of ah apoplexy.... all's fine now, dent fixed...but it was one of those times where I just should of not been so paranoid and just left them alone.
Well she proceeded to sort of bear hug them to carry them away and guess what? Yep one got away and bang straight down onto the hood...Suffice to say we both had our moments of ah apoplexy.... all's fine now, dent fixed...but it was one of those times where I just should of not been so paranoid and just left them alone.
12-21-2005, 08:38 PM
#13
Burning Brakes
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Originally Posted by fuenfer
Raised the windshield wipers off the window glass while detailing the car. Then I opened the hood, which caused the wipers to hit the rear edge of the hood and smack down onto the window with a loud "thwack." I don't think that my paint was scratched or anything, but gosh, did I feel stupid.
12-21-2005, 08:39 PM
#14
I had my new car for a few hours when I went through a narrow drive through cash station and scratched a rear rim. Had just picked up the car from the dealer where I had declined the wheel and tire insurance.
12-21-2005, 08:53 PM
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Blowing off Elieses at XXX on a service road in Texas(usual speed limit 45MPH!!!). These two don't screw with me anymore....the same goes for a couple of WRX Si's. They have learned the meaning of Porsche and I'm lucky the Polezei wasn't around!