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Interesting thread and you were very lucky the guy paid for the damage. He may be an A$$hole but at least not a complete one.
I think it is fair to expect to be able to do test drive when buying a car. And running the rpm's up to close to redline is something I would want to do to make sure the power comes on smoothly. But you only need to do that once or twice as you accelerate on to a highway. There is no need in a test drive for any dramatic manuvers though. You just want to see how the car handles and how the suspension feels.
I would not buy a car from someone if they refused to let me drive it. Generally in talking to someone you can tell if they are serious or not. As the seller you always have the right of refusal for a test ride if you don't feel comfortable. Just understand that you could be wrong and lose a potential sale, but it is your car and your right to go with your gut instinct.
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