mcipseric

Installed the RS alternator hub, got one of the wires crossed and fried the alternator....

CamsPorsche

Not a Porsche but with my first NSX decided to track it.

Not having remembered that my aftermarket wheels use a hub-centric ring I kept it on the hub. Put on my stock rims and torqued down the screws and headed out. Luckily it was a slow first corner where all of a sudden I felt this wicked vibration coming from the rear. Instantly I pull over to discover 4 of 5 holes with screws loose. I thought to myself "man I forgot to tighten this wheel". I proceed back to the pit ever so slightly and re-tighten the wheels. Head back out and again the same vibration this time I was forced to stop.

Putting the jack underneath the car and removing the wheels I discovered the rings. The car required new hubs all the way around as I sheared off the bolts!!! No damage to the car's exterior however....!

Can you imagine what would have happened had I continued like that??? Such a dumbass!

Ed Hughes

I turned what was supposed to be about a 3 or 4" "partial" engine drop on the 911 into almost a full engine drop-I don't know what I was thinking-opened the floor jack all the way up and stared at the motor dropping for a second before waking up and twisting the handle. Pulled the hose off the oil tank-it looked like the Valdez ran aground in my garage.

Mike J

How'a feeling now Travis?

jscott82

Almost forgot about this one....

Was working on my wife's car, had the rear jacked up with a cheap Harbor Freight Jack (the same one a lot of you have). Go to lower the car, twist the handle... and the release valve breaks off. Car is not going anywhere.... Tried to take the pressure off by wedging 2x4's under the tires but that didn't work. Climbed under the car trying to delicately turn it with vice grips, and WHAM!! it releases all at once dropping the entire car just mm from my face.... Thank God I had those boards under the tires or I would not be typing this right now...
Lesson learned, get better tools.

the funniest...

When I was a teenager I had just installed a new "posi" rear end in my 71 Cutlass hotrod. Put the rear of the car up on ramps and chocked the front tires to do something.... Went to drive off and the car wouldn't budge bliped the throttle and still nothing... blip it a little harder.. WHAM... both ramps shoot out from under the car, car "falls" and sits there bouncing like bobble head.... I had forgotten to remove the chocks, so the second blip shot ramps out and into the back wall of the garage.... I was very lucky the posi was working and it didn't just push one out, or just push them halfway where the body hit them.... In the end it was absolutely comical just like in a movie.

Im sure there are a hundred more that I don't care to remember...

Cactus

Installed the Weltmeister and #001 Golden Rod according to Porsche PET diagram....which is reversed to show detail. Had everything buttoned up but the car wouldn't go in reverse....had to tear it all back apart and reinstall.....

Edward

First off, Travis rocks! Not only for doing the herculean job and persevering, but for documenting it ...awesome!

My biggest screwup was an engine rebuild on my motorcycle (at 17, when you know everything ). Buttoned it all up, fired it up, and everything was perfect. Yeah, score, I am soooo good! Ahem, a few miles later got an oil leak at the cylinder head/barrels ....which turned into oil everyhwere on practically the entire seam. Hmmm, I guess I really shouldn't have used that gasket "sealer" right there! Got heck for it from a buddy who really knew his stuff ...Hahaha!!! Humility is a great teacher

Edward

firesm

Last spring I was going to take my MY 02 wheels with tires on them to the tire shop to get the tires taken off in preparation for getting them powder coated black. I had loaded the tires into the back of my pick up truck (that has a folding tonneau cover) the night before, to save some time the next day.

The next morning I get up, load my 5 year old into the rear passenger side then walk around the front of the truck to get in.I Drive off. About 10 min from my house I come to the first intersection (a very busy 3 lane in each direction intersection) that I get a red light at. Looking in my rear view I see a large transport truck behind me. Light turns green, I take off, and I hear that sickening sound of heavy items sliding on a plastice bed liner sound that every pick up truck owner has heard who FORGOT TO CLOSE THE TAILGATE Followed by the air horn honk of a transport truck. I look in my rear view to see four MY 02's with tires rolling in complete opposite directions through the morning rush hour intersection... I pulled the truck over to the side, parked, and ran through the intersection with traffic stopped in all four directions collecting the wheels - leaning each one against the closest light post as I grab it - making it to the last one as it began it's death spiral onto it's face...

I was lucky that they all landed out of the bed onto their tires and rolled, as they survived unharmed, and as I stood there out of breath, holding the last tire, traffic started to move again and 25-30 sets of eyes all looked at me with that "nice job - dumb ***" expression...

Trevor-uk

The simple and reasonably cheap task of replacing a tired battery was upended entirely by my failure to remember that the Optima battery I had installed several years previously had a different terminal orientation to the standard type battery I was nonchalantly and blindly reinstalling. Cue much smoke and arm waving later - ended in a very expensive engine out repair (albeit with a high degree of "while you're in there"...............)

P-daddy

Nothing too terrible. The first oil change on my first car. I poured the entire 4 qt of oil in the crank and it all ran right out the drain hole Oops....forgot the drain plug. Then my second car...went to connect jumper cable to battery and crossed polarity. POW!! Car dead for a week.

JPP

When I was around 10, my mom used to let me back the car out of the garage. So, she was taking me somewhere and I got to the car first as usual, and just got in and started the engine and put it in reverse like always, and she said 'No, we're late .. let me in'. So, I went to slide over the seat and my foot hit the gas pedal and by the time I'd recovered and hit the brake, the drivers door was torn off mom's brand new Pontiac station wagon ..
My mother, undaunted, grabbed the door and dragged it out of the way onto the lawn, got in the car and we left.

NC TRACKRAT

About 25 years ago (Has it really been that long?), I imported a BMW M635CSi (24 valve, dbl. overhead cams). shortly afterwards, the factory came out with a recall to install double valve springs. Although BMW NA wanted nothing to do with "grey market" BMW's, BMW AG supplied the spring kits but labor was up to us. Armed with all the required factory tools and the shop bulletin, I proceeded to perform "open heart surgery". Everything was going fine until one of the cam shims didn't want to come out with compressed air so I tried using a very small screwdriver to "help" it along. Wouldn't you know my oily fingers let it slip and I watched as it dropped (in sloooowww motion) down an oil return drain hole (which I stupidly hadn't blocked with a shop rag). The only plausible solution was to remove the cast aluminum oil pan and hope that it had dropped all the way to the bottom. A day's worth of labor later, the oil pan came down just far enough for me to reach in and retrieve it. Fortunately, the rest of the job went without incident. Lesson learned the hard way, I made sure to block every possible opening on the next one, a '85 Euro M5.

coreseller

Non P-Car but will never forget. Restoring a 1968 442 25 years ago, put the mechanical fuel pump in, upside down, . After all, that's how I remembered the Chevys looking from prior assemblies. The mechanically driven pump arm chafed against the timing chain for a few minutes sending bits throughout the motor ("Why aren't we getting fuel PRESSURE!!!!" I'm yelling at my buddy). Yep, pull it, rebuild it again. There's more where that came from..................

Mike J

Oh sh*t forgot a big one. Engineers in Canada wear an "iron ring", which is a stainless steel pinky ring that symbolizes the obligations and ethics associated with being an engineer - with public service, etc.

Ok, so I am changing my battery in the 993 Targa late one night getting ready for some Porsche event about 5 years ago, and am using a 13mm wrench to tighten up the positive terminal. The wrench slips on the terminal post nut, and makes contact between the positive and my iron ring, and the ring contacts the negative!!

POW!!!! 450+ AMPS surges through the ring, turning it white hot like LORD OF THE RINGS. I yell, and holding my scorched finger, run to the house....well the kids, for ONCE in their lives, LOCKED the $)#**$# door. I fumble for the keys, get into the house, and run for the sink, putting my hand in cold water, cursing loudly at this time.

Did I mention it was after midnight?? My cursing wakes my wife up who come running down the hall, looks at my finger, and almost passes out. OK, now either I go to the hospital NOW, which means the finger will be swollen and the ring has to be cut off, or I remove the ring NOW!!

Ok, I am old, the ring has not been off my finger for 25 years, and is now seared into the flesh of my finger. I give it a good tug - no go. I start TWISTING - my wife is looking with wide eyes bigger than 19" RUFS...and I put SOAP on it, and twist like hell. Now, you know what went through my head? GEE, I WONDER IF MY FINGER IS STILL ATTACHED STRONG ENOUGH? I managed after a few twists to clear the ring, rinsed off the wound, and it looked like an overcooked turkey my mother used to make, clean though the skin on all sides.

Ok, so what does a good Porsche guy do? Go to the hospital? NO..... Go to the doctor?? NO Put a quick bandage on it and finish the goddamn job?? Yup, wrapped it up, and went down to the garage, and put the $#)*)( battery in.

Needless to say, the next morning it hurt like a bugger, so I went to a clinic - the doc told me that I came very close to losing my pinky - no much meat to fry there. I was in bandages for the next 8 weeks, screwed up my summer vacation (no swimming), and now I have the ultimate ENGINEERS RING!

rsr91128

Travis is just a rookie, there is not enough bandwidth to support my stupidity, so here are a few from recent years.

On the 993:
There was the locked the only key in while cleaning the car. Slave cylinder pin missed the notch like Mark D. I am not going to discuss the muffler misalignment. The fresh scratch in the drivers seat leather from the screwdriver I forgot I had in my back pocket and a just few minutes ago I cracked the plastic throttle cable adjuster under the middle of the car (I swear it must have been cracked before I just finished it off).

A year ago on my beater old truck I installed a new clutch and flushed the clutch circut with new brake fluid. A week later the master and slave cylinder started leaking, I had mixed DOT 5 into the DOT 4 system without noticing, it ate all the seals, did I metion it has an internal slave cylinder, out comes the transmission again. I had not changed the rear main seal because it was not leaking, 2 weeks later the rear engine seal started leaking, out comes the transmission, 3rd time was the charm. On a positive note I can now drop the trans in about 45 minutes.