pedsurg

How often do you drive the car. I've found that a real (not cigarette) battery tender is a godsend in these cars, particularly ones driven, ahem, intermittently.

jack

shamrock

It does sound a bit strange that all the lights do their thing on the dash but there isn't the slightest hint of the motor turning over .. It's a pretty easy exercise to multimeter your battery , you'll get one real cheap in the likes of Sears / Radio shack and the assistant will probably be able to tell you how to go about metering the battery ... Turn this into a learning experience!!

BobbyT

Just in case you haven't already tried this, lock/unlock the car with the remote, and them immediately try to start it. Sometimes when the starter won't turn the engine over, it is the drive block system interfering, and it resets after unlocking with the remote if the engine isn't started within a specific time period.

Steve 96C4S

Well, I'm off to the store tomorrow to get the device to... "multimeter my battery". It sounds like the old line from Saturday Night Live in which the 2 bodybuilders guys were there to "Pump You Up".

Before I do that I'll try jumping it with my wife's Acura. I hope it's just a battery. I have no idea what that DME thing is, but I've heard about it here before, that I shouldn't drive across the country without one, so maybe if it's not the battery I'll look into getting one of those on Tuesday!

Steve R

JasonF

These were the exact same symptoms when my DME relay went. I actually went through two in a matter of a few weeks, so always have a couple on hand. When keeping a spare in your car, place it in the glove box and not in one of the door storage bins. I think that the constant opening and closing of the door weakened/damaged the electrical connections of the second relay contributing to its short life. Good luck Steve; maybe a local Rennlister can loan you a relay to see if that cures the problem.

shamrock

Just to be sure , it's a Multimeter .. Nothing to do with Mullets!!

Here's some info on DME's

http://p-car.com/diy/relay/

Marlon

Steve - I just noticed you lived in Silver Spring - I live in Northern VA and could possibly drive out and let you try a known 'good' dme relay!!! I can also bring a good battery.

mar

Steve 96C4S

Marlon,

I'll take you up on your offer! I'm PM'ing you... I live in Gaithersburg now, time to change my profile.

THANKS!

Steve R

chris walrod

If the car doesnt turn over, its not the DME relay. Very kind offer nonetheless!!!

FisterD

Yes, with a bad DME, the starter will turn , but will act like it is out of gas (because the fuel pump isn't turning on).

pedsurg

the suspense it killing us; do you have a set of jumper cables ??
jack

f8vr993

+1 on jump start...
Did you try and did it start?

Steve 96C4S

Chris and FisterD - thanks for the info on the DME relay. Now I know I can rule that out...

And sorry guys, I know I'm lame. I'm about to go to a Memorial Day picnic with a bunch of friends and as SOON as I get back, I will get my jumper cables out from wherever the heck they are in the basement (we moved recently so it'll require a search) and try to jump it from my wife's Acura.

Stay tuned...

Steve R

pedsurg

do they observe yankee memorial day, confederate memorial day, or both in Maryland ??

Jack

Steve 96C4S

I never heard of Yankee or Confederate Memorial Day, just Memorial day... but I do know one thing, I feel really stupid right now. I would have bet it wasn't the battery. It couldn't have been the battery. To me, and my lack of automobile knoweledge, if it was the battery, the lights would have dimmed or not have gone on... the car would have at least tried to turn over which wasn't the case. Guess I was totally wrong. I got my wife's Acura positioned right next to the Porsche, hooked up my ancient jumper cables to the Acura, read the instruction booklet from the 993 like 5 times, trying to read between the lines till I understood what to do, then connected the positive to my Porsche, barely getting it over the cable area and wondering if this would do the trick or was even right, then it said to connect the negative to a ground on the 993. I couldn't find nor understand what would constitute a ground, so feeling even dumber now, I connected it to the tiny rim they include with that tiny spare next to the battery.

I went back to the Acura and started it. I let it charge for 2-3 minutes, knowing for sure this was all for nothing, and then tried the 993, praying it would work but knowing in the deepest, darkest, least secure part of my heart that of course it wouldn't because I have 2 left hands when it comes to cars.

But, you guys were right. It was the darn battery. It started right up. I could have cried with joy because
1) It wasn't another expensive repair
2) I would be driving my Porsche tomorrow all day for work, even if it rained, stormed, tornadoed, I was driving that car, and not just tomorrow, for the rest of the summer, unless I needed to shuttle people around. I would normally not drive it if it rains, because I would then have to clean it again and I'm lazy. If I only drove it when it was nice and sunny out, it would stay clean alot longer, and I wouldn't have to expend near as much energy getting it "perfect". That's actually failed logic, because I bought the car to drive it, not just on perfect days, but any day I don't need space for 3 people.
3) Now I know that if this happens again, and I actually remember this experience from this weekend, I'll know what to do. And yes, I am leaving those jumper cables in the car permanently!

Now, about those trickle chargers, I found a thread on the site here from 2007 that someone recommends the $55 one from Sunset. I'm going to call them tomorrow, as long as it's the cigarette lighter based one and I don't have to crack the hood each time to connect and disconnect it. Or, I could just drive my car ALOT and not buy one at all. )

Thanks everyone and especially Marlon, thanks for your generous offer to swing by one day to check out my car.

Steve R