CodyBigdog

I learned a little secret about elite private schools….I learned this while I was in grad school (at an Ivy League school, where i came in contact with many students that hailed from upper crust, elite NE private schools). Those schools don’t flunk out students. Nor do they give out sub-par grades, Almost zero attrition rate. Once you get in, you are a lock to graduate. That is both good and bad. The good is, as a parent, you don’t have to stay on top of your child’s progress…and don’t have to worry about them flunking out. But once the students realize this, IMO, it promotes laziness. I remember a good graduate student buddy of mine, who was from a Canadian public school, graded on the “bell curve” in one of the sessions he was teaching. That meant that approximately half the class got scores on exams that merited a C, or below. It didn’t take long before he was called into the Dean’s office and chewed out. He was told, flat out, we don’t flunk students here…they have ALREADY proved their worth by being admitted to this Ivy League institution. We only give A’s and B’s. Where as in good public schools, it’s more cutthroat competition, and they do give out failing grades. I attended both public and private schools and quite familiar with the difference.

achenator

my youngest son was a national merit finalist and 35 ACT (not superscore) and got into ) zero Ivies, nor Michigan or Georgia Tech or UNC Chapel Hill. The competition is insane now.

CodyBigdog

Yep, fully aware. Have kids in my neighborhood going through the process right now. When asked, I advise their parents on what to do.

The lowest ranked Ivy had an acceptance rate of 8% (and it’s only this high because it is the largest Ivy..ie, biggest Freshman class). 93% of those accepted had SAT scores in the range from 1400-1600….so still very select.

The highest ranked public Universities are, in order: Cal, UCLA, Mich, UNC and UVA. It’s exceedingly hard to get into either Cal or UCLA if you are an out of state student. They limit the number of out of state students accepted to Ivy League levels. My youngest son went to UMich (Go Blue) because they were in the top 5 in CS, behind MIT, Stanford, Carnegie Mellon and then Mich. Mich acceptance rate, this year, is 18% (only because they are a large school), with 70% of the Freshman having a SAT score between 1400-1600. My son had 1525 some years ago when he applied. .

There’s a lot that is factored into who gets into one of these top schools - public or private. Certainly grades, SAT scores, sports/extracurricular activities, essay (and in the case of my oldest son that went to an Ivy League school, his interview); even the HS your kid is coming from matters (Universities actually score/rank high schools…as a way to try to normalize kids that have different GPA’s….as some HS’s hand A’s out like candy, while other high schools you have to earn your grade.

Even what college (within the University) the kid is applying to can make all the difference. Example, My youngest son that went to Mich was also accepted at an Ivy League school, but only in the engineering college. CS was in the College of Letters and Science. So he declined their acceptance. Theoretically, he could have accepted, and then tried to transfer over once there…but we were told that was not a certainty, as it’s “space limited”.

Best of luck to your son. I will give him some advice….what matters MOST is not where you go, but what you do with the opportunity. Some of the brightest kids I knew never did much in school and had a grand old time while at the Unoiversity. I, on the other hand, and tried to part this onto both of my boys - I told them they couldn’t do anything about the innate intelligence they were born with, but they can always out work, out hustle those who are brighter. I wasn;’t the brightest student at Cal, but I like to think I worked the hardest, as i use to close down the library (back when students studied in the library)….I was one of the few caucasians that would leave the engineering library at Cal, when they closed at 1AM.

Hard work is the great equalizer to genetics.

Another suggestion for your son, if he has his heart set on one particular school….if it’s a public university, many state legislators have now written into law that for in-state students (only applies to instate/where parents have paid taxes for x number of years) …the law guarantees transfer admittance into the state flagship school if the applicant has at ;least a C average, or better at their other college (or community college). This has come about at a number of top state schools, who do admit a sizeable % of out of state applicants. Parents of the instate applicants raised a fuss with the local legislators, saying that they paid taxes all these years and their kids can’t even go to the local state school because they are admitting too many out of state students. So, state legislators starting writing laws guaranteeing any state student with passing grades, would be guaranteed an admission spot in their junior year.

Even some Ivy schools do this…look at Trump who didn’t have the grades to get into an Ivy, so he went to Fordham University for two years and then applied to UPenn in his Junior year, where he was accepted.

jp884

I'm not even talking about grades and pass/fail rates. I'm just trying to keep them away from the woke agenda and that learning about the LORD is not a 4 letter word like public schools would like to preach. They are all in private Christian schools which starts each class with a prayer and ends with a prayer. Can't get that in public schools. I'm a product of public schools and ended up graduating from an Ivy League school but a lot has changed since I attended school.

CodyBigdog

I agree with what you said, that a lot has changed in public schools. Some of it for the better, and some of for the worse.

That said, as a parent myself, one is going to do what you feel is best for your children, based on your own perspective….but know this, trying to shelter your kids from learning what other people think, or say, will ultimately backfire. That’s even more true today, with easy access to the Internet.

The best you can do is try to teach your children right from wrong and hope, when the time comes, and it will….they will have the right moral compass to decide on their own.

Best of luck.

PS - You can’t get prayer in public schools because of the Constitutional tenet of the separation of Church and State. Take it up with the Founding Fathers, as even back there, they realized the dangers of mixing church with state. Not to mention, your kids should be able to get all the church they need at home and at church. School should be about learning things like reading, writing, math, science and history, etc.

jp884

Wow, we really have diverged from the OP post What's everyone having for dinner tonight?

CodyBigdog

Yes, but anytime someone wants to get things back on track, they can do so. Nobody’s stopping them.

Chicago deep dish pizza…shipped in from Lou’s in Chi-town.

achenator

He ultimately ended up at a large state school in the southeast, His scores got him a 5 year full ride with MBA included. He's very $ conscious and is salivating at the $ in his 529 and I told him we'd also help fund his first home when it's time. Chem/physics with MBA he ought to be able to at least feed himself. I hope lol. Thanks for the help. He is in his 2nd semester and thriving so far.

CodyBigdog

Sounds like a good plan.

My son who went to Columbia was a dual major. He first just wanted to do business, and then I said, business degrees are a dime a dozen….and needed something to differentiate himself from the crowd, so got two degrees (5 year plan) - Business and economics, with a minor in Chinese (yes, Chinese). He graduated in 2009, in the middle of the Great Recession…he had 5 offers. He told me, per his own experience and from experience of friends working on Wall Street….getting a MBA is not needed. Actual experience will move him up the corporate ladder, quicker. I don’t know about that (not my area of expertise)? I wanted him to get a PhD in economics from the University of Chicago, but he wanted to work. Things worked out and he is doing very well. He paid off his flat after just two years ownership. He plans to keep his current place and will buy something else, and rent out his current flat.

He is doing better than I was at his age, so nothing I can advise him on.

jp884

a fellow Lion I graduated in 2004 I still vividly remember when we threw our graduation caps off and started dancing to New York, NY by Frank Sinatra over the loudspeakers with our parents. Good times!

rodsky

street tacos and no disrespect, my daughter went to private catholic school. Everything was good except for all the religious stuff . Nothing against it but not my thing. And I like keeping it separate from school etc

jp884

no disrespect taken. But you did enroll your daughter into a catholic school. It’s not like they pursued you so you can’t get upset when they teach Catholicism at a catholic school. That’s like going to an Italian restaurant and being upset because there was no sushi on the menu. You know what you signed up for when you go to places. And I had street tacos tonight as well

rodsky

i hope they were good.

and you’re 100% right - i knew what i was getting into when i signed her up. A Great education. Not upset. The religious part just wasn’t her cup of tea nor mine. We were respectful towards the school and to those that wanted that experience.

jp884

👍🙏💪

737gdog

I just want my child to be happy and healthy. All will work out. Don’t overcomplicate things.