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Lamest Craigslist ad

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Old 05-15-2012, 11:59 PM
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Van
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Default Lamest Craigslist ad

No affiliation, but this is pretty lame: http://hudsonvalley.craigslist.org/cto/2980969463.html
Old 05-16-2012, 12:44 AM
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pontifex4
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At least it's not contradictory like that 400hp 8v NA...
Old 05-16-2012, 12:47 AM
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Bri Bro
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That is it? I guess he is a man of few words.
Old 05-16-2012, 01:01 AM
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RazrPorsche
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I dunno...sounds pretty nice and enticing from the 3 words, 3 numbers, and 1 letter that he wrote.
Old 05-16-2012, 03:27 AM
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Den951
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Whenever I see an ad like this, I get this picture... Guy and girl, guy and girl need some money/more space or so on... girl tells guy to sell car. Guy does not want to sell his car. Guy puts up ad with no info no picture because he knows that it makes it the least likely to sell. Guy tells girl he posted it online for sale but for some reason nobody is calling, hmmm must be the recession...

It's the same thing when I see an ad like... No Free Rides!! Only call between 5 and 5:15 pm do not leave me messages I won’t call back, do not E-mail me I will not respond, price is firm $100,000 for my truck.

Obviously somebody is not really ready to sell their car.
Old 05-16-2012, 03:33 PM
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Alternatively, there's this ad: http://sfbay.craigslist.org/eby/cto/2986691239.html

1986 Porsche 944 - $3000 (concord / pleasant hill / martinez)
Date: 2012-05-08, 9:44AM PDT
Reply to: ---
I moved to California in 2005 to look for software QA work here.
Finding none, I put less than 500 miles on my Porsche between 2005 and 2009, while I continued to have restoration work done on it.
[Side note: I have an ongoing back injury which precludes me getting in/out of low-to-ground cars, and so, have taken the "non-op vehicle" renewal option for the car's California tags/plates.
I now drive to/from therapy in the 180-degree opposite of a Porsche: a horror-esque Dodge mini-van. I feel better, but, hey, it is so very UNsatisfying.... Oh well.

This whole selling process -- of passing on this car -- is difficult for me, because it essentially says "good-bye" to my software engineering career. That income -- which afforded me my 944 restoration project -- was thoroughly destroyed by economy-ransacking bankers, power-consolidating militarists, and a brothel of puppet-***** "politician"-things. So, rather than grovel for and at jobs whose fetid focus is constructing "prisoner"-nation software which spies on the public, privatizes social identity, spams everyone everywhere, banalizes social communication, or tries to collect money from the already-ransacked population, I accept that I can no longer afford my intended [complete] Porsche "restoration" project. Enough editorializing about a reality we all know exists, and which has affected all life on Earth.

My 930T was beautiful, but was an unmanageable ride (300hp, with turbo, would "lose" the rear end often, and only got 9mpg); school-buses beat me off the line until the turbo and 2nd gear kicked in.... However, this 944 has quickness, balanced-handling, and affordable mileage (26mpg) to join its beautiful lines. Despite several nuisance-level design flaws (rearview mirror, hatch/engine air tubes, short-legger back-seat), it is my favorite of the Porsche family. It is very affordable in terms of parts, mechanics, and insurance. I just have different priorities now, so someone who is in the sports car or Porsche mood will be quite pleased.

This is a car that currently runs and drives well. It offers you an investment-expansive, eye-catching, and fun-to-drive "project" in terms of any extra/further restoration you choose. I can provide full Porsche documentation, contacts, mileage, dates, manuals, etc..
I've saved all Repair Records going back to April 2002, and have put in approximately $10,500 into the car. It's got very new and/or unused transmission, clutch, brakes, oil pan, front end, etc.
I start it, change fluids, etc. and drive a different car, and even drive it very seldom.

Here's the general information:
Year/Make/Model: 1986 Porsche 944 (non-turbo)
Odometer: 173,095
Paint: "Porsche red"

And, here's the "extras":
Haynes Manual
tire cables
Kenwood ( KDC2022 CD player and FM/AM radio, with removable "face" and cover case)
Passport radar detector
tire pump
car cover
Porsche rims/wheels (locking)
wide rear tires
black leather interior
Porsche floor mats (which fit on top of the standard mats)
bra
car alarm (randomizing code enabler/disabler that controls door locks, starter, and siren)

$3000 OBO!

Notes on Trades:
I will negotiate a sale-trade which may include (1) heated/vented/floored greenhouse and/or (2) off-grid solar energy collection and storage.
[This is not the PG&E-attached "Net meter" system which transforms "customers" into energy-serfs who then transform PG&E into energy broker-lords.]
I do not want another car unless it has been converted into a "water car".

Notes on Payment:
Apologies in advance if this is considered rude, but I want honesty in this transaction, and Craigslist is swimming with "cons" and thieves on both sides of sales transactions....

A "cash" deal would have to come from a bank or credit union clerk (vs. you) as the penalty for holding counterfeit currency or cashier's cheques is that the "holder" loses the money owed as well as the item sold, and there is a lot of fake fiat money "out there".
So, avoiding precautions defines one's codependency with a process requiring the roles of 'victim' and 'victimizer'.

Hence, for the safety/security of both parties, I no longer will accept any quick exchange of checks, cards, cashiers cheques, money orders, signatures, title, or even what looks like currency.

I propose that we would conduct the "funds and papers exchange" phase of any agreement at the bank down the street, where any funds can first be converted to cash before being handed to me for the title.
Honesty and preparation will hopefully prevent any misgivings, unintended disrespect, and will send thieves in another direction.
What I am seeking is a good home for my Porsche.
That will be based on both my very fair price, complete records, and an honest sales process.... a "win-win", as they say.
Old 05-16-2012, 05:18 PM
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Now that's an Ad!!
Old 05-16-2012, 08:46 PM
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RazrPorsche
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OMG, LOL! Crazy ad...
Old 05-16-2012, 10:45 PM
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Black51
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There's a saying, the more you talk, the more you talk yourself out of a sale.

I'd opt for the first ad...



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